Grahame Coats

"Absatively"

- Grahame Coats' annoying catchphrase

Grahame Coats is one of the main antagonists in Anansi Boys by Neil Gaiman.

Biography
Grahame Coats is said to resemble an "albino ferret in an expensive suit" and if one thought such when seeing him, they wouldn't be the last. Grahame Coats is the boss of the Grahame Coats Agency in London, England and he is very strict, saying "No music of any kind during work, it speaks of a lackadaisacal attitude such as one abhores in the working hours." Grahame Coats goes by both names. Not Grahame or ever Mr Coats.

Grahame Coats is in contact with a widow of his friend Morris Livingstone, his wife Maude wants her husband's will paid off but Grahame Coats is eager, the thief, to keep it himself and run off to the Caribbean. Grahame Coats is also Fat Charlie Nancy's boss, and he is very cruel and cold with him. However, as he tells police, two months ago he would have said Charlie was the salt of the earth. But when Charlie's brother Spider pops up and fools Grahame into thinking he is Charlie, Spider asks about the Cayman Islands accounts of Grahame's that he hacked into. Spider suspects black market money in Grahame's account.

Grahame frames this on Charlie, pinning the police on Charlie and having him arrested. But Charlie falls in love with the female officer and this all works out. Grahame Coats continues to rip off Maude, she pays him a visit and finds all the stolen jewelerry he has been hiding. Grahame promises her the will, but then he gets out a hammer, and viciously clubs Maude to death breaking her skull and killing her when she finds his money.

Grahame then flees the scene, destroying evidence, and he signs out of England, moving to the Caribbean. He flies over. He lives in a villa with his cash in total luxury for his crime.

However, Rosie, Charlie's ex-fiance, and her mother, come on holiday to the Caribbean, and they meet Grahame at a club. Grahame invites them back to his house, being a creep, and flirts with both of them before shutting them in the basement and he stands on the porch smiling and waving when their ferry goes off without them.

When Charlie comes to the island, Grahame tries to kill him in his limo by running it into Charlie's car. But Grahame eventually feels downtrodden and he pursues Charlie and officer Daisy, Charlie's new girlfriend, to the island club, where he threatens them both at gunpoint. But Charlie does a karaoke, something he had been terrified of, to save Daisy, then proposes to her. Daisy agrees, and this stops Grahame from shooting her.

Grahame retires to his villa and sulks over his plan being thwarted. He begins to have dreams where he is a giant predatory tiger. He goes down to the basement on pretense of freeing Rosie and her mother; but when he opens the door Rosie's mother knees him in the balls, then Rosie beats him on the head, and they escape.

Tiger, the source of Grahame's dreams, appears to him in the cellar, then asks to possess him. Grahame agrees, and then he is possessed. Tiger uses Grahame to chase Rosie and her mother to the door, but they are cornered.

Now Maude Livingstone's ghost has been determined to haunt Grahame ever since he killed her. Maude appears in the house and traps Grahame, throws Tiger out of him, then turns his soul into a stoat, putting Grahame  in a coma. Grahame is taken to hospital but dies there in the coma. Maude is able to move onto the Afterlife in peace.