Bart Thumper

"I am The Evil Guff! And I will get what I want!"

- Bart Thumper's last words.

Bart Thumper is a boy who uses his farts to get what he wants in the episode The Rise and Fall Of The Evil Guff in the British scary story series Grizzly Tales for Gruesome Kids.

Bart was a boy who never wanted any vegetables. His parents tried to find way to convince him to eat them, but failed. On Bart's 9th birthday, they used a sweet butterscotch icing to disguised a cauliflower as his Birthday cake. That night, after eating his first vegetable, he felt betrayed by his parents, and hopes on getting revenge. But in his thoughts, he had his first fart. He rushed downstairs to tell his parents about his discovery, they dropped from the smell. As his parents bargained with him to give him what he want if he didn't drop another one, he found the means to control his parents.

Mr. and Mrs. Thumper were excited when their son wanted vegetables. But they didn't know that Bart only wanted them as fuel for his "weapon". He'd been experimenting under his sheets while fulling his stomach with gassy greens until he was ready to change the balance of power.

He tried getting out of school by releasing a fart so big, the entire just collapsed (literally). That night on the news, Police Inspector Smoofer had nicknamed him "The Evil Guff.

Bart's parents took him to an all-night surgery, where the doctor has diagnosed that Bart's stomach is quickly turning vegetables into methane, turning him into a living stick bomb. When they got home, they threw away all their vegetables. When his mother stated "It's like living with a cow," it gave Bart an idea. He ran outside and started eating the grass from the lawn. The next day, he release a fart that blew both his parents halfway to Scotland, where they were run over by a llama truck. With no parents to stop him, Bart was free to spread chaos.

So Parliament decided to act after Bart had brought the country to its knees. The Prime Minister planned to have Bart live with bears, for they wouldn't mind the smell; plus the idea that they'll kill him. Unfortunately, the bears they put him with are much more civilized than they'd hoped. Three minutes later, Bart escaped by propelling himself upwards over the perimeter fence via a high-pleasured fart, and hide out in a caravan in the Chiltern Hills.

The next day, Bart televised to the whole world his demands: a helicopter pad, his own island, a cook who makes spaghetti balinese, a shark tank, a fluffy white cat, an exploding pen, and 6 billion pounds for a submarine. He swear that if his demands are not met within the next hour, he would eat an entire field of grass, and release a bottom-burst that will destroy the world's ozone layer all at once. He caused such a global panic. But nobody thought he could do it, so they didn't reply.

When the hour was up, Bart ate his grass and was about to give off a big one. But the blast was so powerful it shot Bart straight out of Earth's atmosphere. Not only did the fart ripped a hole in the ozone layer, but in the space-time continuum behind it. Bart landed in a dung hill in 1261. Bart slowly died from composting in the dung pile for three straight years.