Pat Mustard

"Teresa, I forgot me feckin' trousers!"

- Pat Mustard, leaving a customer's house 'very early in the morning'.

"I thought you were Marilyn Monroe."

- Pat Mustard on Mrs. Doyle's dolled-up appearance.

Pat Mustard is a one-off antagonist from Irish comedy Father Ted. He serves as Craggy Island's milkman, and also has an addiction to 'delivering more than milk on his rounds'.

He was portrayed by Pat Laffan.