Thread:ThatScrewyDuck/@comment-27960787-20191001043327/@comment-39032584-20191001123518

Oh, did you just hear that? Yeah, that happened all the way back in March. I was distraught about it at the time since it was all over an accident on my part, but since then, I've not only gotten over it, but in retrospect, it was probably for the best since I never felt like I truly belonged there. I think I already told you about it when I first created an account here in April, but maybe I never told you what the specific incident was? I don't mind telling you, but it does require some in-depth explanation to understand.

Okay, so I don't know if you've ever noticed this, but I never use swear words when writing here. Sure, in the case of this wiki, they discourage you from using anything excessive, but there are still some users who let the odd word out sometimes; however, in my day-to-day life, I'm actually very sensitive to that, to the point I go out of my way to avoid it sometimes. Therefore, I'm generally very comfortable here due to them discouraging people from doing it too much in their rules... but on TV Tropes, as you well know, they're comparably more loose about that. Therefore, a while back (as in 2015 and earlier), I would sometimes edit swear words that seemed unnecessary, and I had stubbornly convinced myself I was doing a good thing. However, the moderators obviously didn't like that, and I was suspended. Eventually though, as you also know, I returned last year and started finding a different way to contribute without editing by participating in the Complete Monster cleanup forum. I didn't always feel like I belonged there, but I learned some great tips on how to improve my writing from those like Lighty and Scraggle, and there were even a handful of tropers I felt like I was developing a bit of a bond with, including yourself.

After doing this for a while, I thought I could try asking for another chance to edit, especially since I felt I had matured enough to not do what I did before anymore. Plus, I developed a better coping mechanism by using a Google Chrome extension called Web Nanny, which edits most swear words when I apply it to any given page (but only from my view, not anyone else's). Anyway, they actually agreed, but Fighteer immediately gave me a strict warning about not making even the slightest slip-up, which sadly, only took a few days to happen. I was trying to make a couple of small additions to the Fruits Basket character page, and as I often do, I used my Web Nanny extension to make myself feel comfortable as I scrolled down the list to the spot I wanted to add a couple of things; but unfortunately, I completely forgot that if I did that in the editing stage, it would ''save all my extension's changes. ''Afterwards, I had a disaster on my hands, especially since it's a far-from-perfect extension, meaning it also changed completely normal words based on their spelling, and I didn't know a simply way of reverting my edits. Therefore, I pleaded with Fighteer to both help me fix and it and let him know this wasn't intentional. How did he respond though? He just banned me immediately and decided "I couldn't be trusted", no matter how much I pleaded on the suspension forum that this was a complete accident and not a regression into my old habits or a case of going back on my word to not do it.

Anyway, sorry to elaborate so much, but I thought you deserved to get a summary of the whole story so that you'll understand. And you know what? If moderators like Fighteer are goign to be so quick to assume the worst about me, and treat me similarly to actual trolls and vandals, I don't want to be there. I do miss being on the CM cleanup forum, doing my part to contribute, and especially interacting with some of the tropers there like you, 43110, Futuremoviewriter, Lighty and Scraggle, but again, even there, I never felt like I completely fit in. I always felt like I was the only one who cared about people perhaps being a little more liberal with their profanity than necessary, and was really bugs me is that there were so many times that I was tolerant and didn't say a word about it, due to not wanting to cause conflict. And this was despite the fact that some users, like TheRealJackieBoy, could be liberal enough about it that I usually wanted to skip over their effort posts altogether. However, I still didn't bring it up unless necessary in private messaging, and somehow, despite all my efforts to both be tolerant and be open to constructive criticism to improve my own writing, Fighteer still thought that one accident, that one sincere unintentional slip-up, was enough to determine they "couldn't trust me", never mind the fact it had been close to 4 years since the last time I edited swear words deliberately.

So to wrap it up, if they decide to acknowledge that I didn't deliberately do anything wrong and that that I'm really not a problematic user like some of them insist on thinking, and they stop judging and scrutinizing every little thing I do, I'd still be open to coming back. However, with people as intolerant and quick to distrust/assume the worst like "Fighteer" running it, I doubt it will happen. At the time, I wish he hadn't given me another chance to edit it he was practically going to use the first excuse he could get to get rid of me and make me lose all of my privileges... but again, if one accident is all it took, maybe it would have inevitably happened sooner or later anyway. I hope this was informative, and maybe even interesting, to read.