Paul and Mary Bland



Paul and Mary Bland are one of the main protagonists in the 1982 dark comedy film "Eating Raoul''. Paul Bland is portrayed by by the late actor, writer, and director Paul Bartel. Mary Bland is portrayed by actress Mary Woronov.

Paul and Mary Bland are a wine dealer and a nurse, respectively, who bemoan their low status in life and dream of opening a restaurant. An exceptionally prudish couple, they sleep in separate beds and disapprove of sex, except for "a little hugging and kissing". After Paul is fired from his job at a wine shop, the couple are left relatively penniless and the chances that they will ever realize their dream quickly diminish. Their plight is exacerbated by the fact that they live in an apartment building that is a regular site of swinger parties.

After a drunk swinger wanders into their apartment and tries to rape Mary, Paul kills him by hitting him with a heavy frying pan. They take his money and put him in the trash compactor. Later, they kill another swinger in a similar fashion, and realize that they could make money by killing "rich perverts", and proceed to do so, getting advice on infiltrating the swinging lifestyle from one of the building's orgy regulars, Doris the Dominatrix.

After finding a flier for cheap lock-installation on their car, they decide, for the safety of Paul's wine collection, to have the locks on their apartment door changed. The locksmith, Raoul Mendoza, is a Latino man who moonlights as a cat burglar, robbing the homes and apartments of his clients. He breaks into the Blands' apartment the night after installing their locks, only to stumble across the corpse of the Blands' latest victim, a Nazi fetishist. Paul catches Raoul and the two strike a deal: Not only will Raoul keep the Blands' secret, he tells them that he knows a place where he can "exchange" the corpses for cash. The Blands accept, and Raoul goes to work for them (he sells the corpses to a dog food company), also secretly stealing the victims' cars and selling them.

One night shortly after, Paul leaves to buy groceries (and a new frying pan, since Mary is "a bit squeamish about cooking with the one we use to kill people") and Mary is left alone in the house. Their next customer, dressed as a hippie, arrives while Paul is gone. When Mary attempts to explain that he missed his appointment, he tries to rape her. Raoul wanders in, sees the customer attacking Mary and strangles him to death with his belt. Raoul then offers Mary some Thai Stick and they have sex.

They sleep together once more, with Raoul attempting to convince Mary to run away with him. After Raoul tries to run Paul over with a car, Paul hires Doris the Dominatrix to pose as a variety of people (including an immigration agent and a public health worker) to try to get rid of Raoul by making him believe he is being deported, and by giving him saltpeter pills (rumored to prohibit males from obtaining an erection). None of these plans work, however, and a drunken Raoul breaks into the Blands' apartment and threatens to kill Paul. He informs Paul that he and Mary will be getting married, and then takes Paul into the kitchen so that he and Mary can both kill him together; instead, Mary kills Raoul with the frying pan.

Mary and Paul then remember they're expecting their real estate agent (who's helping them buy their dream restaurant) for dinner. With no food in the house, and little time before his arrival, Paul and Mary cook Raoul and serve him for dinner. The last shot of the film is a smiling Paul and Mary in front of their brand new restaurant, with the caption, "Bon Appétit."