Thread:B1bl1kal/@comment-24618333-20170317150526/@comment-24618333-20170404153456

Before i continued the cleanup, i got a question.

Remember the chapter of my fanfic that titled with Tlob's Trauma Part 2 where Tlob finally revealed her horrible past where she had Nefarian put her life into so much hell? Well, i was thinking about how the scenario looked like as part of cleanup to made Nefarian less sympathetic and genuinely dangerous monster. When Tlob telepathically showed Raido her horrible past, do you think this scenario below made Tlob more sympathetic and cemented the fact about how evil and monstrous Nefarian was?

''Raido now having himself in the place that appeared to be the courthouse at Massachusetts akin to the ones in Pilgrim age, but four years ago. A crowd of onlookers gather around a platform at the head of the room where officious-looking gentlemen stand around a table.''

''He moves unnoticed through the crowd toward the platform. The hubbub of the villagers dies down. The imposing figure of a local judge, tall and august, with stern eyes, marches out of a side chamber, steps up onto the wooden dais and seats himself silently between his solemn peers. Through the way they stare on him, Raido could tell that he was highly respected by the villagers, implied that he’s not just a judge, but also their chief. A trial is just about to begin. ''

''Given that everything that he sees are pure memories, Raido knew that this is not his trial, but rather someone else'. He then turned around, and found a pair of middle-aged men, probably rednecks, dragged 10-year old girl to his side before hastily left her. Her long, dirty blonde hair is unkempt and dirt on her face is streaked with tears from her eyes. Her manacles have been specially made to fit her tiny wrists, and weigh her to the floor. She was obviously scared, but tried the best to remained steady. Upon recognized the little girl, Raido was horrified that the girl is, in fact, the young Tlob herself.''

''“Rebecca Barnes, on this day you have been arrainged for horrible crime of arson and murder witnessed by those whose testimonies have been heard”, the judge said. “Should your testimony prove consequential, Counsel will consider whether you proved guilty or not. Until such time you remain in the eyes of these good people a convicted arsonist. Do you accept these terms?''

”I-i do”, the young Tlob hastly said.

''A pale woman fiddles nervously with the ribbon on her bonnet as she is questioned by the Judge, whom nodded and giving the Judge the notes about the testimonies. This followed by a pale, scarred man whom recounted his own testimonies to the judge. Like the judge, the scarred man, whom none other than Nefarian Crane himself, had stern and cold eyes, but something on that man disturbed Raido more than the judge: Both of Nefarian’s eyes looked milky white as if the suffer decomposing, and is wondered whether he can see through them.’’''

''“Before i decided, the lawyer may give us some evidences to see whether Rebecca proved guilty or not for her crimes”, the judge said as he turned on the said lawyer, whom none other than an odd-looking old man that Raido recognized as Corinth in his human disguise. He was sat beside the man with fedora hat and the silver-haired girl—Mr. Blake and Crona themselves.''

''"I have examined the testimonies from the witnesses carefully and they were interesting”, the old lawyer said as he revealed a vial of what appeared to be white dust. “Some of them quite accurate, but things are not looked as it seemed. You see, after examined both the scene of the crime and how Rebecca’s powers work, it’s much more likely that Rebecca had nothing to do with the fire. In fact, should she used her powers, with or without her will, she would always leaves trace, that can be picked up with our rainbow dust within this vial. If the dust changes into color of that of rainbow’s in a certain location, it means she or other sorcerers has performed witchcraft in the said place previously. If black, it means a dark magic has been performed in the area. If not changed color, it means no mystical activities occured in the area. When we tested the dust in the scene of the crime, we found no trace of sorcery ever performed there. Instead, we found the fire was caused by more mundane means: Someone was buried a match and an empty wooden oil barrel not far from the scene of the crime. Also, other witnesses stated that she was not in the village when the fire started and at that time we just met her near the forest alongside Crona. With this, Rebecca is confirmed had nothing to do with the fire.“''

''“Oh, really?”, Nefarian sneered. “Then how about incidents and misfortunes that she caused during last few months in the village?”''

"We also examined both testimonies and relevant evidences about those incidents as well, both from Rebecca herself and the others”, the lawyer added, ignoring Nefarian’s demand. “Some witnesses stated that accidents she caused were due to bullies pick on her and pushed her that she accidentally hurt them with her powers. Few said that she did it on purpose. However, it was not Rebecca that deserve the blame, but rather your irrational fear that led you hurt her and someone had used it for their advantages: That person knew she can do things everyone in this village cannot understand, and thus use your irrational fear as advantage to frame her by starting the fire before provoke you to capture Rebecca and brought her to this court.”

''”It’s not possible”, Nefarian protested. “None of people in this village would do such terrible thing!”''

''”SILEENCE!”, the judge bellowed whilst hit the gavel repeatedly with his hammer. ”Unless the witness confirmed the true culprit behind this horrendous crime we can determined whether the convicted is guilty or not.”''

''”We have one more vital evidence which confirmed the mastermind of the fire and murder, and this one was from the victim’s own last message, Your Majesty”, Crona suddenly speak. “The victim, Iosefka, managed to left an important message before she died and ensure that we can find it among the rubble in the basement. From it, we learned the fact that the actual culprit knew about irrational fear of Rebecca and has planned to use your fear for his own gain. Though Iosefka herself feared Rebecca, she opposed the culprit to turned the whole village against her. Because of it, he torture her and left her to die in the house that he later burned to frame Rebecca in the first place!”''

''The crowd gasped and horrified with the revelation, with the judge demanded, “The name! Give us the name!”''

''”Nefarian Crane”, Crona grimly exclaimed. “He is the true culprit.”''

''At once, the crowd is in uproar. Some rednecks goes to seize Nefarian, only for the scarred man send them sailing with a single blow. Nefarian then stepped in and said, “What they said was true, your Majesty. It was i who responsible to kill Iosefka and framed that girl with my own crime. But for me, it’s not a crime, but a mission to save you all from damnation. You see, I have seen the worst in people like her before out there, and they breed like rats. They put stone on top of stone and then led you all, and the rest of humanity live in their filth. And you must understand, God is testing you all since the day that girl was born in this very village. I know you feared her because she was different, but you have to, as her existence was the sign of damnation that would fall onto this village! All i did was meant to stop that damnation.”''

''”Damnation?”, the judge asked. “Are you saying Rebecca is some kind of antichrist or something because of her powers?”''

''”How could you do that?!”, Crona snapped. “Rebecca is not the harbinger of damnation! She is just little kid. She may have powers that made her different with anyone in this village, but in some ways she still like them. I mean, even if she was destined to bring damnation onto this village due to her powers, she still have the choice to follow that destiny or not.”''

''”Blasphemy!”, Nefarian bellowed to Crona. “You heathen had no idea with what you have done!”''

''”I know what i did, Nefarian!”, Crona insisted, before explained to everyone present. “As i said before, Rebecca had powers that made her different with any of you. But she is just like me... like any of you. Just like us, she had hopes, she has dreams, and she has choices of what she can do with her powers. But you pushed her that made her difficult to choose. If you keep pushing her, you will only destroyed yourselves along with her. To be honest, I don't understand why Rebecca was different with us that made her more like a monster than a human being, but I believed God have reasons why she was gifted with tremendous powers. I mean, whatever gifts that God gave to us, even if that gift made us more like a monster than a human being, He always have the purpose to gave us that gift, and He also gave us clear choices of what we can do with it as well. Don’t you see? The way you treat Rebecca all this time made her difficult to choose what she can do with powers that she had from birth. If one day she indeed brought damnation onto this village like Nefarian said, it won’t be her fault, but yours for pushed her to the point where you unknowingly destroyed yourself. What i’m trying to saying is, whatever bad things that she did to you were because she constantly reacted with mistreatments that you done to her. And now we had to stop it, for good.”''

''Crona’s voice of reasoning amazes Raido at best. He was impressed with both her sense of justice and her view regarding choices that one had with their gifts. As Crona said, God always have reasons and purposes why He gave humanity their gifts, and gave them clear choices of what they can do with it. This includes the young Tlob as well: In spite the fact that her powers made her more like a monster than a human being, Tlob actually have the choice to use it to for good things, but the fearful villagers pushed her and treat her like the outcast that she would’ve taken the wrong choice had they not stop mistreating her. Through her speech, everyone whom present in the trial realized their wrongdoings on Rebecca and become remorseful with what they have done.''

''But not for Nefarian. Disgusted with Crona’s speech of reason and furious that his plan ruined by her, Nefarian revealed a dagger hidden under his coat and said, “This is Blasphemy! This is Madness! Looks like i had to deal this myself!”, before throws himself at Tlob in an inhuman speed. That was the moment where Raido saw a movement among the crowd: A young boy, with brown hair and black eyes like him, goes to interfere by pushed Tlob aside before Nefarian could reach her. Unfortunately, in doing so, Nefarian wind up stabbed the boy with the dagger on the chest by accident.''

Time stops as Tlob realized what has happened: That young boy has sacrificed himself to save her from Nefarian, where the angered scarred man tossed him aside in coldblood right in front of the Judge, whom horrified by what just happened.

''Both Raido and the young Tlob yelled “No!” at the same time. Overwhelmed by the pain, rage, and sadness over her and Tommy’s ordeal, Tlob became snapped and unleashed her destructive magical powers, summoning black tendrils around her body that fatally impaled Nefarian and pinned him to the wall. But to everyone’s surprise, he shrugged the pain and cut down impaling tendrils with his dagger before removing the rest that impaling his body. Undeterred, Tlob send more of her black tendrils, this time to break every single of the bone of his body before summon a few more to conjure energy balls. Before she could fire them however, someone suddenly yelled on her, “Rebecca, stop! Don’t be the monster they fear you are!” ''

''That was Crona. She was horrified that her friend nearly become a killer for severely injured her tormentor. Tlob still mad at Nefarian, but realizing that killing him would made her as evil as the very man who put her life into so much hell, she decided to spare him and went for the dying Tommy. Mr. Blake tried to use his magic to save Tommy’s life, but even with his powers and Tlob’s assistance, the wounds were too severe. ''

'' “Tommy, you idiot!”, young Tlob yelled at him, with tears began to ran to her cheeks. “Why are you doing this?!” ''

'' “Because I… I know you’re not a monster like what they thought”, Tommy said weakly. “I don’t want them hurt you because of it... Even if you are different from the others, you still have hopes and dreams like me… and everyone else. Tlob, no matter what happens, promise me you won’t become a monster everyone feared you are.” ''

'' “I promise, Tommy”, young Tlob said. “But please… please stay with me, okay. If anything, I wish we could go back to the days we spent our time together.” ''

'' “So do I…”, Tommy nodded in his last breath with a smile. ''

''The young boy attempted to stroke his friend’s face for the last time, but his hand suddenly fell before it could reach her. Realizing that Tommy succumbed to his injuries, Rebecca hugged his lifeless body and weeps, mourning her dead friend. Everyone around her, including Judge Meritorious, also mourned over Tommy’s tragic demise. Raido only able to watched on with tears of his own forming; he never knows how heart-wrenching to lose a best friend until now. It might be reasons why she doesn’t like to tell anyone about her past.''

''Unfortunately, such heart-wrenching moment vanished in the next instant, as the mourning interrupted by Nefarian’s cold and maniacal laughter. ''

"What the God damn you laughing about?!", Raido and Crona roared simulataneously.

''"It's just so funny and pathetic!", Nefarian said maniacally. "A living sin that imitate human's emotion? Definitely a disgusting view and violation of the order of everything!”''

''"You mean your cult's Order of everything?", the Judge yelled. "I heard you taught my people your belief where you stated that Rebecca is nothing but harbinger of damnation during your sermons. You thought i attended your sermons because of me believed with your lies? No, i attended your daily sermons because i know from the beginning your presence will bring negative influence to my people and I only get along to made sure of it. I may wary with Rebecca’s presence in my village, but it doesn’t mean I hate her as much as you. Besides, it was my idea to accept Mr. Blake in this village to solve this problem until you ruined it.”''

''”Oh, really?”, Nefarian sneered. “All this time you tried to help that girl to fit in even if you don't want to admit it in front of the others? What use of helping her while leaving your own people in a living hell tormented by hate, heartache, chaos, suffering, and death because of her presence? All I did was to rid of you of those things.”''

''“That was you think, Nefarian”, Crona said coldly. “But believe it, not all people agreed with your corrupted ideals and belief.”''

''”I have faced many people who questioned my duty, with you the second of the worst ones”, Nefarian’s voice deepened as he spoke to Crona. “But none of them escape death. How about you and those villagers?” ''

''Even if it was the vision from his girlfriend’s past, Raido can feel the atmosphere around Nefarian changed. For the Prime Merlinean, sensing utter malevolence from his eyes feels as if the sun was gone from the sky. He can feel darkness reaching out from his eyes, consuming him in utter dread.''

''But Crona seemed indifferent with her friend’s tormentor, perhaps because of her anger on him. “You just going to die right now”, she challenged him.''

"Is that so?”, Nefarian bellowed, with his rage inflates on them. “Well, is this your wish to do battle with a hideous monster who ruined your best friend's life and sees people around him as gullible faithless people?! HOW INFIDELS!!!"

''Raido realized he'd been wrong to only believe the worst part of Tlob's tragic past was losing her best friend. Her loss was the beginning of the true nightmare for her and the villagers. The Prime Merlinean stares in horror as Nefarian's mouth abruptly opens at a grotesque 90 degree before his lower jaw split apart and spewing forth strange yellow gas that enveloped the whole room. This prompt everyone in the court room evacuated the whole building, includes Crona, Tlob, Corinth, and Mr. Blake whom carry Tommy’s lifeless body with him. This prompt Raido to followed them.''

''Even with the strange gas obscured his sight, Raido still able to see Nefarian whom body getting bigger with his arms enlarges into huge bat-like wings. His clothes violently shredded by his growing body as his legs become larger and muscular, with shape reminiscent with that of dragons. His growing body began to shatter the whole building from the inside, collapsing it. Just as everyone came out of the building safely with Crona being the last, they heard a loud, inhuman shriek before a huge claw swat her like a fly, sending her sailing to a local church and collapsing it at once.''

"Oh no! Crona!", Mr. Blake cried.

''Simultaneously, everyone turned on the collapsed building, and expected by a vision from hell: Nefarian has transformed into a titanic, monstrous, and skeletal-looking vampire bat that rose from the debris. The creature has grayish armor plates that goes across his spine and forehead and possesses a pair of grayish leathery wings that had bony 3 digit clawed fingers with opposable thumbs on them. In that form, his teeth become pointy sharp fangs while his tongue and some part of his mouth cavity warped into fanged proboscis-like organ form. Its body, with exception of its clawed wings and head that grayish pale in color, was brown and taking decayed appearance as bones of his clawed toes exposed and his ribcages protruding from the chest. The winged beast’s lower jaw can also split apart as well. But the most horrifying was, skeletal human corpses that still writhing and moaning can be seen protruding from his body. ''

This is something neither Raido, nor any sane people, want to actually see.

''A split second later, everyone, includes Raido himself, was screamed upon the unimaginable horror before them. The bat monster Nefarian transformed into then stomped on a terrified woman near him with bony claws on his right wing, crushing her to death before thrown her bloody corpse to the horrified man on the distance, pinned him. He then crawled onto the terrified man and stomped his skull to death before he could get away.''

''Raido doesn't know whether Nefarian insane all along or it was the side effect of his transformation that warped his mind into a brutal, primitive, and animalistic berserker beast whom took out his anger on villagers in brutal and sadistic ways, but he only able to conclude that Nefarian was both figurative and literal monster worse than any bad guys he ever faced. All this time, he has faced many horrible bad guys with Morgana being the worst, and never believed anything that worse than her. But when seeing Nefarian went into berserker state and killed innocent people after failed to frame the girl he loved and exposed as zealous magic-hating bigot, he knew there are much worse bad people whom so bad that one day, they literally turned into literal abomination. Even by this point, a terrified villager yelled, “That girl was right! He’s a devil!”, right before Nefarian pinned him to the ground and tore his heart alive before devouring it. ''

''And as the bat monster moves closer to a local orphanage, his presence terrified a group of children who played near the building. One of them cried, "For the love of your lives, RUN!!!"''

''Raido sees those innocent children flee for their lives, and inhabitants of the orphanage, a number of orphaned children, abruptly and recklessly flee from the building in terror. Tlob and Mr. Blake see them too, and so does Nefarian. The children’s distressed screams seemed to irritated Nefarian more, as he opened his mouth wide again to breathes a gout of gas, which this time highly toxic that flowers that touched by the gas instantly withered out. But then, the monster focused his toxic breath into a focused and pressurized gas stream that both push and cut through a house in front of him. He briefly had difficulty to control the gas stream, before to everyone’s horror, directed the pressured gas stream to the orphanage and obliterated the building in a single swipe! This effectively killed fleeing children whom either struck by toxic stream, buried alive in the rubble and poisoned to death, or both. Tragically, Raido swore that one of the fleeing children hysterically cried, “I wanted my mommy!”, before struck by the toxic stream and instantly killed.''

What do you think about it?