Lord English



Lord English is the primary villain of the webcomic "Homestuck". He is an indestructible time-travelling criminal cherub who was raised on a post-apocalyptic Earth.

Biography
In his younger years, Lord English went by the name Caliborn. He was an alien called a cherub. Like all cherubs, he had a counterpart of the opposite gender and morality, Calliope. Caliborn was the evil half while Calliope represented the good of the two. Eventually, one of the two personalities would overcome the other and take full control of the shared body.

Caliborn and Calliope were born on a now uninhabited planet Earth, taken from its native solar system and put near a giant red star. The two were given food, shelter, multidimensional internet connection, magical artifacts and an account of several heroes from other universes by Gamzee Makara, a worshipper of the adult Caliborn. Their body was shackled to their room to prevent them from leaving and the two grew up communicating with four humans from Earth's past: Jane Crocker, Jake English, Roxy Lalonde and Dirk Strider. Calliope was incredibly fond of them and wrote about them, drew art of them and became quite a fan of their tale. Caliborn, on the other hand, developed a hatred of them, Calliope's devotion, their silliness and their lengthy conversations.

Caliborn spent much time jeering the kids and playing "games" with them to irritate them. He did the same with Calliope, playing chess games with her and infuriating her with unsporting tricks. However, as the two began to escape their planet by playing "Sburb", a game used to create new universes, Caliborn hired his universe's version of Jack Noir to kill Calliope's dream self so that Caliborn can prematurely take full control of his body. As Calliope goes to sleep and ends up having her mind killed by Jack, Caliborn wakes up and bites his leg off to free himself from the shackles that had contained him his whole life and replaced his leg with a robotic leg.

He proceeded to enter the game, but because it isn't a single-player game, he had no new world and instead just ended up bringing the post-apocalyptic Earth with him. Caliborn leaves his home, no longer stuck there, and meets Gamzee, who assists him in finding the world's boss, Yaldabaoth. Yaldabaoth tells Caliborn that he can save millions from suffering or obtain unlimited power and ruin the lives of the many. Caliborn chooses the latter, and is told to knock fifteen planets into a black hole and then engage Yaldabaoth in battle. Caliborn does this, gains fourteen new minions along the way known as The Felt and obtains incredible powers.

Many years after his victorious session, Caliborn has adopted the title Lord English. He appears in the universe of his minion Gamzee Makara thanks to the sacrifice of his loyal servant, Doc Scratch. Lord English then travels throughout time, leading The Felt, ensuring his arrival and turning Gamzee's planet into a brutal and warlike planet. After travelling throughout time, Lord English appears in the home of Homestuck's author, Andrew Hussie. He destroys Hussie's robotic dupilcate, attacks his lover Ms. Paint and chases him to a balcony where English shoots Hussie to death.

English travels to the Furthest Ring to kill the ghost of Calliope. English wipes thousands of ghosts from existence, leaves glowing cracks through time and space and kills the deities of the Furthest Ring on his senseless rampage.

Personality
Lord English is a brutish figure. As an adult, he talks little and instead chooses to communicate with mass murder. He doesn't care about the wellbeing of any other and simply desires to completely annihilate his "sister" Calliope from reality just to say he beat her. It is highly implied that Lord English didn't mature at all from his time as a chid.

When he was young and mildly less destructive, Caliborn expressed almost nothing but displeasure and hatred. He wastes time writing large paragraphs to tell people how he hates how they waste time and talk in giant blocks of text. Caliborn also doesn't have any qualms with killing, as demonstrated when he orchestrates Calliope's death. Similarly, he doesn't have a concept of friendship and loathes working with people.

Caliborn also shows misogynistic behavior towards every female he encounters and enslaves several troll women. Lord English also causes the entire species of trolls misery because he knew Calliope liked them.

Abilities
Lord English is a nigh indestructible force of nature. He can kill the undead with a giant laser from his mouth. This blast has also caused cracks in space itself. Lord English also wields a massive gold machine gun with a green laser sight. He can use his Cairo Overcoat to turn into a sarcophagus that can take him anywhere in time and fly.