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I will have my money by evensong tonight, or... YOUR BOTTOM WILL WISH IT HAD NEVER BEEN BORN!
~ The Bishop threatening Blackadder.

The Bishop of Bath and Wells (also known as the Baby-Eating Bishop of Bath and Wells) is a character in the Blackadder II episode "Money'.

He was portrayed by the late Ronald Lacey, who also played Major Arnold Ernst Toht in Raiders of the Lost Ark.

Biography[]

The Bishop of Bath and Wells gained his nickname "Baby-eating Bishop of Bath and Wells" because he would eat babies after he baptised them.

The Bishop was the assistant manager of St Herod's Bank who lent Lord Edmund Blackadder one thousand pounds. One year after lending him the money, Blackadder had failed to pay. Therefore, the Bishop of Bath and Wells confronted Blackadder early one morning after throwing Baldrick through the door. Blackadder claimed he had lost his wallet, so the Bishop could see him at the gravestone of a man whom he had killed from inserting a spike up his bottom.

Blackadder tried to compromise the Bishop by saying that he would tell the Queen about his adventures with Molly the prostitute, but the Bishop stated that the Queen would not believe Blackadder. The Bishop warned Blackadder to have his money by 4pm, or he will die with a red hot poker up his bottom.

By 4pm, Blackadder had raised and lost one thousand pounds. With no money left to pay the Bishop, Blackadder arranged for a sleeping draught and the finest painter in England. His plan was to drug the Bishop and lure him into a compromising position with Lord Percy, disguised as a woman. The painter was to paint the scene and he kept the preliminary sketches. Knowing that Blackadder had got the better of him, the Bishop has to pay Blackadder one thousand pounds and another one thousand pounds so he could buy back his house.

Personality[]

The Bishop of Bath and Wells is a sadistically manipulative, perverted, dangerous, and violent man, who enjoys killing people who have failed to pay. He is corrupt, especially since he is in a position of being a holy man. However, there is anything unholy and blasphemous about him.

He claims to be a "colossal pervert" and states that animal, mineral, or vegetable, he’ll do anything to anything. He also enjoys the company of inexpensive prostitutes such as Mollie. He is angry when customers are able to pay up and also drowns babies in the christening font and then eats them later in the vestibule.

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