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“
And what if you forget about me? Do I just cease to exist if you forget about me?
„
~ Robert Klingher
“
Fern Petersen, will you die for me?
„
~ Robert Klingher, trying to make his ex-girlfriend Fern Petersen into committing suicide in order to be with her in the afterlife for all eternity.
Robert Klingher is the eponymous main character of the 2015 American coming-of-age supernatural comedy horror movie Clinger (also known as "The Stalking Dead" in Germany). He is a love-stricken teenager who was the driven high school senior Fern Petersen's boyfriend (for a month and 3 weeks) later turned into her living nightmare when he returned from beyond the grave as a crazed and angry love ghost and he would stop at nothing to make her his one and only someone, even it kills her.
He was portrayed by Vincent Martella, who also played Gregory "Greg" Wuliger in the period sitcom Everybody Hates Chris based on the troubled teenage experiences of comedian Chris Rock during the 1980s.
The once human Robert Klingher in his former life.
Born in the year 1996 and raised in Houston, Texas, the 18 year-old Robert Klingher soon came to the lovely Fern while she fell over a hurdle fence and dislocated her left shoulder as she was practicing her track and field running and was about to break her PR. Fern needed Robert to pop the bone of the shoulder in a slow and steady pull directly away from her body without any sudden movement. He successfully did popped her shoulder in. After that, the two became quite acquitted and began dating.
"Happy 1 Month and Three Week Anniversary!"
After that romantic sunny Friday picnic Robert Klingher planned for each other, the two teens formed an official relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend, although they have not had sex for they both wanted their first time to be perfect. For a whole one month (and later to one week to third week), the relationship for Fern Petersen has become slowly bit rocky as Robert becomes overly affectionate towards her alone; he gives her so much sweet gifts including a red seemingly plastic teddy bear with big teeth that repeatedly says "I love you very much" in a cringey male voice, he constantly takes pictures of both him and her together (though she slowly tired of the pictures with Robert being too close to her). Another gift he later present a creepy picture of what their "dream child" would like he made on the Internet once they began to have a family in the future (which will never happen). This, much to Fern's pity and disgust, was a tipping point in which the young woman's relationship with Robert becomes very sour. Later the next day at school, Fern and her very Christian best friend Moellyn "Moe" Watkins with a thing for Eskimo-kissing (pressing the tip of one's nose against another's which is loosely based on a traditional Inuit greeting called a "kunik") soon discovered her locker was fill with magenta rose flowers and a love letter (complete with the cutout picture of both Robert and Fern with repulsively big smooching lips) saying Robert loves (with a heart shape) Fern FOREVER!". That would be seriously the last straw that broke the camel's back.
While Fern consults with both her best friend Moe and her entrepreneur sister Kelsey over the Robert Klingher situation, Robert was currently working on his another gift to Fern at the backyard of his house, a red 3-stair step double-guillotine contraption with the banner that says "I LOVE YOU FERN!". His parents, Eugenia and Arthur Klingher, finds this new gift to Robert's girlfriend quite dangerous indeed.
Love kills...
Later the next the night, Fern Petersen came to the Klingher residence at the request of her all enamoring soon-to-be ex-boyfriend Robert and walks into the house after the too obvious pink note with 3 magenta heart shapes on the front door that reads "Come inside. I'm waiting.". Fern came to see Robert playing his "Fern" song on a piano within his family's living room that was decorated with so much all white fairy lights/Christmas lights, red fluffy-looking paper-mache lines hanging from the ceiling, and flowers. He even gave her a pink teddy, while he continues singing the song until the end. Robert then takes Fern out into his parents' backyard now highly decorated with fairy lights for this romantic evening. When Fern tries to tell Robert something, Robert, while getting his "love" guillotine ready, foolishly claims he knows what she is going to say, for he has been wanting to say something for a longest time. As he begins to kneel down and holds the rope to his guillotine, he shouts "Fern Petersen, I love you!" before Fern herself quickly says "I think we should break up" and Robert accidently fell off his knees at the sound of Fern's last words to him and says "Wait, what?", while letting go of the rope and placing his head at the left-side bottom of the frame, positioning the neck directly below the one of the 2 heart-styled blades. The blades are then released along with the signed banner at the top of the frame, both quickly falls down and the second blade decapitates the boy with a single, clean pass as the head falls into one of the baskets below filled with pink confetti. The head of the now late Robert Klingher hits the left side of the guillotine and fell onto a bloodied Fern Petersen's hands and the girl screams at it in pure shocking terror, for this whole nightly romantic evening planned by the love-sick boy turn into a fatal and embarrassing accident.
Return from the Dead[]
The deceased Robert Klingher appears before Fern in front of a bathroom mirror.
One week later, signs of Robert Klingher's sudden return from the dead began to manifest that night: Fern Petersen's macaroni and cheese with bacon bits on her dinner plate (with the the "FU" bacon bits letters meant to prevailingly keep her sister Kelsey's obnoxious Adonis-like boyfriend Dead away from her) suddenly later changed to a heart shape, and then the haunting melody of Robert's "Fern" song started playing on her stereo, especially after she turns it off. And then she ran to her bathroom to wash her face and all of sudden, she sees in the mirror the bloody ghost of Robert for one brief moment and screams before he disappeared.
After learning lessons and answers from her gym coach and retired ghost hunting expert Ms. Valeria Kingsley (who refused to do ghost-hunting anymore), Fern decided to give it a try & began to flip upside down & chanted the late Robert Klingher's name 3 times in order to summon and prove it is not all in her head.
He later leads a band of 5 restless spirits including the ax-wielding murdered ex-wife named Temperance Baker. He weaver he later decides to let fern go after realizing he loves her enough to let her live after she convinces him they can't be together despite her falling in love with him after he became less clingy and stopped smotherin her and her regretting breking up with him after he died.
Quotes[]
As a Human[]
“
I think you've dislocated your shoulder.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen after he came to her aid.
“
Yeah, I know. I sit behind you in 5th grade again.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Peterson upon their introduction.
“
Hey Fern. It's me, Robert. You think maybe you and I could think throw you a party sometime? Like at my house. All my friends. I got friends, lot of them. Hey.
„
~ Robert Klingher practicing his monologuing in front of a mirror.
“
Fern Petersen... WIll you be my girlfriend?
„
~ Robert Klingher
“
♪Fern, Fern, Fern♪ Fern, Fer-Fer-Fern♪ Fern, Fern, Fern, will you be my first girlfriend?♪♪
„
~ Robert Klingher's song about his first love Fern Petersen.
“
I just don't know if we're ready. I want our first time to be perfect... Because you're perfect.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
Happy one month anniversary.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
Happy one month and one week anniversary.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
Happy one month and three week anniversary.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
It's what our kid will looked like. I made it on the Internet.
„
~ Robert Klingher showing Fern Petersen a photographic picture of their never-to-be child (much to Fern's recently growing displeasure towards Robert).
“
Thanks, Mom and Dad. Hey, check this out.
„
~ Robert Klingher showing his "loving" 3-step double-guillotine contraption made for his dream girl Fern Petersen.
“
♪When she does parted, hurts my heart♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪ She has nice hair and here's a teddy bear♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪ I'll always be with you, no matter what you do, Fern♪ ♪You're smart and clever, and I'll be with you forever♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪ Fern, Fern, Fern, Fern, Fern♪♪
„
~ Robert Klingher's "Fern" song.
“
I wrote that last year when I sat behind you in Ms. Garrett's class.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen about his song dedicated to her.
“
I know what you're gonna say. & I've been wanting to say it too for the longest time.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen (although she wanted to break up with Robert due to his clingy affection toward her).
“
Fern Petersen, I love you.
„
~ Robert Klingher's last words upon his death.
As a Ghost[]
Part 1[]
“
Why would I be mad at you? I love you. I was planning on telling you, but, then it's such a blur. It must've been some kind of bug or something.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen, unaware of his recent passing.
“
It's okay, Kelsey. Kelsey?
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen, though unaware of the fact that he is now an invisible dead ghost amongst the living.
“
It's very funny, Dean.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Dean, though ignorant of the fact that he is now an invisible dead ghost amonst the living.
“
Why are you hugging her?
„
~ Robert Klingher asking Fern is hugging her sister Kelsey, though ignorant of the fact that he is now an invisible dead spirit.
“
Why didn't I get a salad?
„
~ Robert Klingher
“
I'm a vampire?
„
~ Robert Klingher asking about his reflection in a mirror in spite of his current status as only a dead ghost and not as an undead creature such as a vampire.
“
Is that why no one is talking to me? Can anyone else see me?
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
Fine. I'll go to my grave. That'll be fun.
„
~ Robert Klingher
“
S**t! I should really learn how to walk through walls.
„
~ Robert Klingher
“
Mostly this. And there's this girl I loved, but she's alive.
„
~ Robert Klingher answering Temperance Baker's question why he looks so glum due to his recent death and his undying love for Fern Petersen.
“
Why you summoned me here? You said I needed time to myself.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen.
“
MIT? Are you trying to leave me?
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen about her leaving for the Massachusetts Institute of Technology she dreamed about going to.
“
MIT is overrated anyways.
„
~ Robert Klingher dismissing Fern Petersen's dream of going to the Massachusetts Institute of Technology.
“
Hey! So, tonight, we're going to have a romantic dinner at the cemetery at 6 o'clock.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen.
“
I have cheese. It's a goat cheese, like the goatest of goat cheese.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen.
“
Look, look, look, look. I also got wine. This comes from the hills of Venezuela.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Kelsey Petersen.
“
I'm gonna be at the cemetery. And I know that you will make some time.
„
~ Robert Klingher foolishly expecting Fern Petersen to make it to their next date.
“
It'll be just like our first date, but I'll way less awkward.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
♪I make things like it were, so I'm always there for her♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪ We have a strong connection and I have a huge collection of things I bought for Fern♪ Like this sombrero teddy bear♪♪
„
~ Robert Klingher's revised version of his "Fern" song.
“
For you, I will do anything. I promise.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
Part 2[]
“
Wait, wait, wait. I want this to be perfect.
„
~ Robert Klingher To Fern Petersen about their first time in sexual intercourse.
“
I thought this would be hard. This is fun.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen during sex.
“
We are having sex.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Klingher during sexual intercourse.
“
I think I'm about to... I'm gonna.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen during their unsuccessful sexual intercourse.
“
I love you too.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen during their unsuccessful sexual intercourse.
“
But, we don't have to have. We could just snuggle.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
Our love survives death.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
That'll show her.
„
~ Robert Klingher, after he purposely ruined the selfish Jenny Bernstein's party on Fern Petersen's "behalf".
“
Stay away.
„
~ The jealous Robert Klingher's echoing voice warning Harlan to stay away from Fern Petersen.
“
I was showing how much I love you.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen after she was trapped in her car flooded with Robert's all-"loving" gifts including his red plastic teddy bears and rose petals.
“
I just wanted things to be the way they were. I'll stay outta your hair.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
♪A true love to endure, you'll die with me for sure♪ Fern, Fern, Fern♪♪
„
~ Robert Klingher's final revision of his "Fern" song.
“
Yeah, because you're alive. I get it. I'll with you the entire time. All you have to do is make a small slice of your arm. It'll be worth it.
„
~ Robert Klingher trying to make Fern Petersen
“
Go get them.
„
~ Robert Klingher summoning his possessed teddy bears to kill Fern Petersen as well as her sister Kelsey and his gross boyfriend Dean.
“
I'm not scared of a water gun.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
I love you Fern, until the day you die.
„
~ Robert Klingher to Fern Petersen.
“
If I'm not meant to be her one-and-only... I'll make it that way.
„
~ Robert Klingher seeking to kill Fern Petersen in order to make her his one-and-only for all of eternity
“
Even I can't kill you tonight, you won't win your race, you won't go to MIT. You'll stay here with me. You still love me. I know you do.
„
~ Robert Klingher monologuing his devotional and obsessed love of Fern Petersen one final time.
“
Fern, I love you.
„
~ Robert Klingher while attempting to murder Fern Petersen as his own act of undying love.
“
WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!?!
„
~ Robert Klingher blindly demanding Fern Petersen's love for him.
Part 3[]
“
I did this for you, Fern. We could've been perfect.
„
~ Robert Klingher blindly demanding Fern Petersen's love for him.
“
Fern, I'm sorry, for everything. When you remember me, can you try to remember the good times, whenever you can, if you can?
„
~ Robert Klingher's last words to Fern Petersen, before leaving Earth. crossing over to the afterlife.
Gallery[]
"Happy 1 Month Anniversary!"
"Happy 1 Month and One Week Anniversary!"
Robert Klingher's grave.
"Robert Klingher, beloved son, friend and boyfriend. 1996 - 2014"
Robert Klingher, now as a ghost.
Trivia[]
Robert's parents, Eugenia and Arthur Klingher.
Robert's father Arthur Klingher is played by Sewell Whitney, and his mother Eugenia Klingher is portrayed by Lisa Wilcox who is well known for the role of the heroic Dream Master Alice Johnson from both A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Master and A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: Dream Child.
