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“ | The Kettleblacks ... they are hard men, and cruel, and they used me roughly. | „ |
~ Cersei Lannister to the High Sparrow. |
House Kettleblack are supporting antagonists in the A Song of Ice and Fire novel series. They are one of the many smaller houses of the Seven Kingdoms, located in the Crownlands. Their sigil is a blazon their arms with a black kettle on red, within a black orle. The Kettleblacks are known for their ruthlessness, lack of honor, disloyalty, and little reading ability. Kettleblacks are known to be tall, dark haired, and with a hooked nose. The only known members are Oswell Kettleblack and his three sons, Osmund, Osfryd, and Osney.
Oswell's sons are initially common sellswords hired by Lancel Lannister and the sellsword Bronn on both Cersei and Tyrion Lannister's orders, working and spying for the two enemy siblings at the same time. Osmund already has a knighthood during his first appearance, although the background behind it is questionable. It is later revealed that all the Kettleblacks ultimately answer to Lord Petyr Baelish and are his agents in his employ, making the Lannister siblings his pawns.
Biography[]
A Clash of Kings[]
Ser Osmund, Osfryd, and Osney are hired as sellswords by Ser Lancel Lannister on Dowager Queen Cersei Lannister's orders to replace Captain Vylarr, whom Tyrion sent out of the capital to Riverrun, to deliver the Iron Throne's peace terms for King Robb Stark and escort Ser Cleos Frey. Not wanting Tyrion to know about this, Cersei calls on the High Septon at the Great Sept of Baelor as cover for secret meetings with the Kettleblack brothers. She wants the brothers to hire more sellswords for her, to match her brother Tyrion's own number of mercenaries.
Unbeknownst to Cersei, at the same time Lancel is reporting her movements and schemes to Tyrion, who had Lancel hire the Kettleblacks for Cersei. Lancel directed them to another sellsword Bronn, who hired them out on Tyrion's orders, so that the brothers will spy on Cersei for him. Thus, the Kettleblacks are paid by both Cersei and Bronn at the same time, with Ser Osmund selling Cersei's secrets to Bronn and telling him everything about her moves in exchange of money.
Following the Riot on King's Landing, the murder of the High Septon, and the end of the Siege of Storm's End, the threat of King Stannis Baratheon is looming over King's Landing, and his forces and sworn vassals are expected to appear soon. Cersei has Ser Boros Blount escort her son, Prince Tommen Baratheon, out of the capital, to be taken into the safety of the castle Rosby. However, Tommen is abducted and taken into custody by Tyrion's enforcers, led by the new Commander of the City Watch Ser Jacelyn Bywater. As a result, Ser Osmund is named to the Kingsguard by Cersei, after she strips Boros of his white cloak for his cowardice on the Rosby road, by not fighting against Tommen's kidnappers, who took him to Rosby anyway, but now under Tyrion's custody (Boros is later reinstated to the Kingsguard by Tywin Lannister). Tyrion is pleased by Osmund's appointment, thinking he gained another one of his agents' ability to stay close to his nephew, King Joffrey I Baratheon. Eventually, Osmund even takes the position of Joffrey's sworn shield to always stay by his side, which used to be reserved for Sandor Clegane, who is now the acting commander of the Kingsguard and is busy with bigger duties such as helping organizing the city's defenses against Stannis, and sometimes serves as Sansa Stark's own sworn shield.
The Kettleblack brothers quickly became great favorites at court in the Red Keep, getting along with both servants and highborns with their humor, charisma, and easygoing manner. Rumors spread that they especially "get along" with the female servants, implying sex.
On Cersei's orders, Osney seizes the teenage prostitute Alayaya, believing she is Tyrion's personal whore. Alayaya (replaced by Ros in the TV series) is kept a hostage, in order to ensure Tyrion will not hurt Cersei's son, Prince Tommen Baratheon, who is being held as a hostage at Rosby by Tyrion's men (also kept in that castle under the pretext of safety from Stannis). This act was also provoked by Tyrion's threat to have Tommen gang raped to scare his sister Cersei. Osney's face receives four scars by Alayaya, who put up a fierce resistance before yielding.
King's Landing spends a few days surrounded by King Stannis's vanguard host, then by the main infantry and cavalry army led by Stannis himself, who besiege the city and burn the kingswood, whilst fighting against Tyrion's Vale mountain clansmen. The full battle starts a few days later, when Stannis's naval fleet arrives at Blackwater Bay and enters the Blackwater Rush. During the Battle of the Blackwater against Stannis Baratheon's forces, Ser Osmund is assigned to guard King Joffrey and stay by his side, along with Ser Meryn Trant. Osfryd became the captain of Cersei's new red cloak guards of House Lannister and remains with the Queen throughout the whole battle.
The battle opens with two simultaneous attacks from the sea and the land, Stannis's fleet and Joffrey's fleet facing each other on the Blackwater Rush, whilst Stannis's cavalry and vanguard also attacks the royal vanguard led by Sandor Clegane. After the naval battle on the river ends with the mutual destruction of most of Stannis's ships and Joffrey's whole royal fleet with wildfire, Osmund's sworn brothers Sandor, Ser Balon Swann, and Ser Mandon Moore lead sorties against the invaders, whilst Osmund and Meryn remain by Joffrey's side. When Joffrey wants to head to the garrison's three great trebuchets known as the "Three Whores", Osmund is warned by Tyrion to keep the boy king safe and not let him out of the walls. As more of Stannis's waves, divided in multiple forces, keep attacking, Joffrey catapults the Antler Men -wealthy citizens and merchants supporting Stannis who have been arrested for their conspiracy to open a gate for him - into the burning Blackwater Rush, to "send them to their King (Stannis)", with Osmund and Meryn guarding him.
Throughout the battle, Osney keeps bringing reports and updates about the status and how close Stannis's men are getting. He also aids his brother Osfryd in the Red Keep. Eventually throughout the battle, Osney reports to Cersei that the River Gate (commonly known as Mud Gate) and the King's Gate are both being attacked by battering rams. Cersei sends Osney back to deliver her order for Osmund to take Joffrey back to the Red Keep. When Osney argues that Tyrion ordered the opposite, Cersei threatens that she will send all three of the Kettleblacks into the middle of the burning battle if they do not follow her order. In the city, after receiving the order, Osmund and Meryn escort Joffrey, who agrees to return to his mother. The King's flight from the battlefield causes the defending royal forces to become disheartened and even provokes some men of the City Watch to mutiny, resulting with the murder of the newly-made Lord Jacelyn Bywater. The fact that Stannis is winning also causes riots throughout the city, the population being terrified of being burned alive for not being believers of R'hllor, due to a propaganda against Stannis made by the new High Septon and Tyrion, as well as rumors about dark arts surrounding Stannis. The Great Sept of Baelor is also flooded with terrified smallfolk, gathered to pray to the Seven with the High Septon, and mobs of panicking citizens and looters fight amongst each other and against the gold cloaks to escape the city at the Iron Gate and the Gate of the Gods.
After a long time of more fighting, a seriously wounded Lancel returns to the Red Keep from the battlefield, to angrily demand for Joffrey to be sent back to lead the royalist forces against Stannis, only to be rejected by his cousin Cersei. After a very long wait in the ongoing large-scale battle against Stannis's forces (presumably a few hours, as Sansa fell asleep in her room), Osmund returns from the city to convey the news to Osney that the defenders have been saved by the arrival a huge relief force. Osney delivers his brother's news to the Red Keep's residents, announcing Stannis's defeat thanks to the surprise intervention of the joint military forces of the Westerlands and the Reach, led by Lord Tywin Lannister, Ser Garlan Tyrell (disguised as the "ghost" of Renly Baratheon), Lords Mace Tyrell and Randyll Tarly, and Ser Kevan Lannister, who had Stannis's scouts and outriders killed before they could report to him long before they reached the capital.
A few days after the battle and the city's celebrations for being saved from Stannis, Osfryd and Osney (as well as their former employer Bronn) are knighted for their service to the Iron Throne and their roles in the Battle of the Blackwater. Osmund, Meryn, and Balon are the only knights of the Kingsguard left in the Red Keep, whilst Sandor deserted and fled the city during the battle, Ser Mandon Moore was slain during the same battle, Ser Arys Oakheart is at Dorne as Princess Myrcella Baratheon's sworn shield, and Ser Jaime Lannister is being held captive at Riverrun (actually already released and on his way back to the city). The three remaining Kingsguards spend hours knighting more than six hundred men during a long court session, with numerous attendants, including Joffrey, Cersei, Tywin, Mace watching. That same day, Margaery Tyrell replaces Sansa Stark as Joffrey's new betrothed to become the Queen. Her youngest brother, Ser Loras Tyrell, joins the Kingsguard in order to stay celibate and stay by her side.
A long time after all the rewards and new titles are given, the Kettleblacks and all the other court attendants watch the numerous captives from the Stormlands, Valyrian isles, and the Reach who served Stannis and House Baratheon of Dragonstone and Storm's End - including lord vassals and highborn knights - being brought to the Throne room in front of Tywin and Joffrey. While most of them kneel and swear allegiance to Joffrey, a group of Stannis's loyal supporters and religious fanatics choose execution or remain imprisoned (the latter only for valuable hostages). One of them, a Florent bastard, repeatedly insulting and cursing Joffrey and his family, declaring Joffrey a product of incest, and promising that Stannis is not done and that he will succeed next time, causing the upset Joffrey to accidentally fall, injure himself on the Iron Throne, and cry for his mother in fear.
Realizing that the Kettleblacks have now truly become Cersei's agents, while he lost all power, his office, and favor, Tyrion regrets having trusted Osmund, as he is recovering from his disfigurement at the Blackwater Rush.
A Storm of Swords[]
Osfryd and Osney are now knights like their brother. Shortly afterwards, Cersei sends the Kettleblacks to Rosby, to retrieve Tommen and bring him back to King's Landing. Alayaya has also been released from custody in the Red Keep by Lord Tywin, now the Hand of the King, but not before having her whipped and threatened with execution for being Tyrion's whore. Varys informs Tyrion that Cersei has been flirtatious toward Osmund. During a day, Sansa Stark sees Osfryd easily defeating Morros Slynt in a sparring match.
Along with Ser Meryn, Ser Osmund is assigned to escort Sansa to the Red Keep's royal sept, for her marriage to Tyrion. While Meryn's mere stare promises violence, if Sansa does not comply, Osmund speaks to Sansa kindly and with charm, convincing her to come along quietly. Later, during the wedding feast, Osmund openly laughs when Tyrion mocks Joffrey when the two argue about the traditional bedding ceremony.
When King Joffrey is poisoned with the Strangler the night of his his own wedding feast in the Red Keep's Great Hall, Osmund rips open the King's collar in a vain attempt to save him. Meanwhile, Sansa escapes from the castle with her ally, court jester, and former knight Dontos Hollard, leaving during the chaos, confusion, and with the masses of attendants rushing to the exit to leave the scene. Oswell Kettleblack, father of the three brothers working at court, waits for Sansa and Dontos on a small skiff on the river Blackwater Rush and smuggles them out of the city, rowing them to the ship Merling King on the sea at Blackwater Bay, where Lord Petyr Baelish, Ser Lothor Brune, and other armed men wait for them. The now useless Dontos is murdered by Ser Lothor and the other men with crossbows on Petyr's orders, to ensure his silence, while the crew sails to the Fingers, peninsulas of the Vale of Arryn.
Some time later, wile Cersei is mourning next to her son's corpse, Osmund stands guard outside the castle's royal sept. That same day he is approached by a bearded and disheveled man who attempts to enter the sept. The two do not know each other's faces, and Osmund acts hostile towards him, threatening to do him arm if he insists to enter, and looking down on him. Irritated to be treated so lowly by a stranger Kingsguard he never met, and supposed to be his own subordinate, the bearded man introduces himself to Osmund as his Lord Commander of the Kingsguard and the Queen's twin brother, Ser Jaime Lannister, who just arrived to King's Landing after a long journey throughout the Riverlands and the Crownlands. A surprised Osmund is forced to apologize to his superior for disrespecting him and allows him to enter the sept.
Osmund, Osfryd, and Osney are called as witnesses for Tyrion's trial and prosecution for regicide, and they provide evidence against Tyrion to confirm his guilt. Osmund lies to the jury and his testimony is entirely made up, whilst Osfryd and Osney tell the court about Tyrion's threat to Cersei, although they omit the fact that he did so after Alayaya was harmed by the Kettleblacks. Tyrion's actual personal prostitute, Shae also testifies against him.
Osfryd and Osney, along with Ser Garlan Tyrell, are usually put to guard King Tommen I Baratheon while Osmund and his fellow brothers of the Kingsguard are busy in their meetings with their Lord Commander Jaime in the White Sword Tower. Throughout the Kingsguard's very first meeting under Jaime's leadership, Osmund is friendly, jokingly accusing the new High Septon associated with Tyrion of Joffrey's murder, as well as laughing when Jaime appoints the cravenly Ser Boros Blount as Tommen's food taster. Jaime is disgusted that his sister named Osmund, an upjumped sellsword with no reputation, to the Kingsguard, although he does concede that the man most likely knows how to fight. Jaime has never heard of Osmund at all and does not know when and where he has received his knighthood.
When tested by Jaime, Osmund claims to be a veteran of conflicts between the Free Cities, claiming to have served in the Stepstones and the Disputed Lands with the Gallant Men fighting for Lys and then Tyrosh. He also claims to have been knighted on a battlefield by a man named Ser Robert Stone, who is now dead. Jaime is skeptical about this story, especially when Osmund does not seem able to elaborate any information about this deceased knight.
It is revealed that all four Kettleblacks' ultimate allegiance lies to Petyr Baelish, when Sansa recognizes Oswell as a Kettleblack during her stay at the "Drearfort", the tower of House Baelish in the smallest of the Fingers, while waiting to sail again to the mainland Vale. Oswell is pleased by Sansa recognizing him, and Petyr reveals that he is the one who advised Oswell to send his three sons to King's Landing. Thus the Kettleblacks have been working for Baelish all along, spying on the nobility at court and reporting all the political affairs and moves to their father and Petyr himself. Petyr explains to Sansa that Lancel, who was in turn secretly working for Tyrion, hired the brothers to serve Cersei, while Bronn, after being informed by Lancel, secretly paid the brothers on Tyrion's behalf. Petyr, however, also tells Sansa that Osmund has become unreliable at this point, presumably due to his stronger loyalty to Cersei and his involvement with the Kingsguard.
Petyr also reveals to Sansa that it was Oswell Kettleblack who hired dwarfs to joust in Joffrey's wedding feast, doing so on Petyr's order in a deliberate effort to antagonize Tyrion and make him become angry at Joffrey, in order to make it look to the wedding attendants like Tyrion is the one who poisoned Joffrey. The ultimate goal was to have Tyrion executed for regicide, in order to make his wife Sansa a widow ready for a new marriage, while at the same time getting rid of Tyrion himself and remove him from active politics, as he was a dangerous threat that was too smart to be kept around for Baelish. Even now both Cersei and Tyrion remain unaware of the Kettleblacks' connection to Lord Baelish, both of them ultimately played by him, Joffrey's assassination also being orchestrated by Baelish himself, again leaving Tywin, Cersei, and Tyrion as pawns going against each other as he wanted.
During Tyrion's trial by combat, Osmund is the one who brings Ser Gregor Clegane his shield, to fight as Cersei's champion in a death duel against Prince Oberyn Martell, to let the Gods decide Tyrion's final sentence.
After receiving a death sentence, Tyrion is secretly released from his cell by Jaime and the gaoler Rugen during the night. Before making his escape from King's Landing, Tyrion learns from Jaime that Tysha, his first wife from when he was a teenager, was never a whore as their father Tywin claimed, but an orphaned crofter's daughter just as she had claimed. Hurt, violent, and livid with fury, and blinded by hatred against his father and whole family, Tyrion taunts Jaime that Cersei has been sleeping with Osmund, along with Lancel, and even adds out of spite "probably Moon Boy", a court fool.
A Feast for Crows[]
After Tywin's corpse is discovered, Ser Kevan Lannister sends Osmund and Boros to inform Cersei about her father's murder. After she joins her uncle, who had Tywin's body moved back to his bed, she instructs the Kettleblacks to dispose the body of Shae, who is scandalously found in Tywin's bed. Warning them and Qyburn that no one must ever know about this, Cersei tells the Kettleblacks to dispose of the body in whatever method of preference, not caring how they do so, so long as the body disappears from the Red Keep. With Tywin's death, Cersei takes the regency of the realm's governance on Tommen's behalf.
When Lord Nestor Royce, cousin of Yohn Royce, arrives at the Eyrie, Oswell escorts Nestor's retinue to the Lower Hall on Petyr's instructions. It is confirmed by Petyr that Oswell is aware of Sansa's identity, the girl now posing as a bastard daughter of Petyr, "Alayne Stone".
On Cersei's orders, Osmund, Osfryd, Osney, and Ser Boros Blount kill two gaolers who slept during Tyrion's escape from the dungeons. This angers Osmund and Boros's superior Ser Jaime, who reprimands the two and tells them that the next time Cersei orders them to do something, they must consult him first, and if he opposes said orders, the two Kingsuards will do as Jaime says and let him deal with Cersei, if she gets angry.
During the notably less expensive, smaller, and more intimate wedding feast of King Tommen and Margaery Tyrell, Osmund guards one of the doors of the Small Hall. When Tommen and Margaery are sent to their chamber made for the wedding night, Jaime is made to watch over the two the whole night, to make sure Margaery does not attempt to either bed, seduce, or hurt Tommen. Later that night, Cersei cheerfully gathers all the attendants and leads them outside to watch the final "entertainment" together, allowing the pyromancer, Wisdom Hallyne of the Alchemists' Guild, to commence the burning of the Tower of the Hand with wildfire, due to paranoia-related reasons. After most of the tower succumbs to the wildfire and collapses, several attendants begin heading to bed, whilst Cersei has Osmund guard her. She tells Osmund how beautiful the sight is, comparing it to Joffrey himself. Cersei stays arm in arm with Osmund, as they both watch what remains of the Tower of the Hand being consumed by the green flames.
Cersei wants Osmund to command the Kingsguard on Jaime's behalf, when Jaime is preparing to depart for the Riverlands, to Harrenhal and the ongoing Siege of Riverrun. Jaime instead gives his subordinate Ser Loras Tyrell command instead, much to Cersei's anger, who later sends him to command a host to lay siege on Dragonstone against Stannis Baratheon's garrison. Still tormented by Cersei's alleged infidelities and Tyrion's allegations, Jaime considers gelding Osmund and sending him to the Wall.
After the departure of the Commander of the City Watch of King's Landing, Ser Addam Marbrand, from the city (heading with his friend Jaime to the Riverlands to restore the King's peace), Cersei names Osfryd as his replacement, giving him command of the gold cloaks, despite his inexperience and inability to read.
The paranoid Cersei has Osney sneak into the Great Sept of Baelor during the night and murder the High Septon, due to his previous association with Tyrion, aggravated in Cersei's eyes by the fact that the High Septon did not say a word to denounce Tyrion's crimes and his murder of his nephew Joffrey and father Tywin, leading to Cersei to fear that the High Septon was working with Tyrion and even the Tyrells. Osney kills the elderly High Septon with a pillow, while he is sleeping. For his services, Cersei rewards Osney with sex.
Ever since Tywin's death, King's Landing has been overflown with devout followers of the Seven labeled as "sparrows" ever since Tywin's death (most of them refugee victims of the war from the Riverlands and the Crownlands), and they made camps surrounding the entire Great Sept of Baelor. Tired of the corruption and abuse of power of the nobility, the sparrows invade the Great Sept's interior by force on the day Septon Luceon (born Frey) is almost elected as the new High Septon. Instead the sparrows force the Septons of the Most Devout to appoint the mockingly-called "High Sparrow". A short time after, Osfryd escorts Cersei visit the new High Septon at the Great Sept of Baelor to satisfy his requests.
Following the election of Jon Snow as the 998th Lord Commander of the Night's Watch and the execution of her informant Janos Slynt, Cersei's paranoia leads her to believe that Stannis Baratheon and Snow are working together against her and the Iron Throne, as King Stannis has recently taken residence at the Wall and took over its lands and the wildlings. To put and end to Stannis and Jon's "ploys", Cersei attempts to kill two birds in one stone by orchestrating a plot that also involves her son's teenage Queen Consort Margaery Tyrell.
Offering Osney to have sex with him again, allowing him to touch her as a teasing "sample", Cersei instructs him to seduce Margaery (also preparing a list of all the men and boys Margaery sees, in order to accuse the ones she does not like nor trust as other lovers as well). Osney and Osmund are to arrange a scene in which Osney has sex with Margaery, and then Osmund must burst in the chamber and pretend to have caught them. Then Osney will be arrested and brought to confess to the new High Septon. As punishment, Cersei will have her son Tommen send him to the Wall, with his escort being assassins. Once at Castle Black, Osney and his fellow thugs will kill Jon Snow, removing the threat and putting an end to the perceived alliance between him and Stannis. For the efforts, Cersei promises Osney a pardon and lordship when both jobs will be completed. Meanwhile, Margaery will face her downfall and will be judged by the Faith for her alleged multiple infidelities, with Cersei also genuinely being sure that a young girl pretty and popular like her is not a virgin at all (later revealed to be true, and despite the fact that Loras claimed she and Renly undressed and took part in the bedding ceremony on their wedding night, it is still claimed she is a maiden). Margaery's scandal will make her lose the public's favor, and status as the Queen, and will give Cersei the ability to dismiss the hated Tyrells and their bannermen from court, as she is convinced they have Tyrion at Highgarden and are plotting with him.
Cersei names Osney as Tommen's sworn shield, so he can spend more time in Margaery's presence, but the ploy does not progress as the days pass. While Margaery does enjoy Osney's company, he remains unable to seduce her, as she does not respond to his charms as hoped, even after Lady Taena Merryweather (also Cersei's agent, as well as occasional lover), told her she has a secret admirer (one of many in love with Margaery). Margaery keeps teasing Osney, but nothing is developing beyond that, although Osney is considered both charming and attractive by the girls. Cersei grows impatient, but Osmund insists it is because Osney and Margaery are never alone, as there are always the women, girls, men, and boys, and even jester of Margaery's huge retinue always around her, including her three best friends and cousins around her same teen age.
Cersei makes a change of plans then; she plots to send Osney to the new High Septon, who has revived the Faith's historical armed forces, the Faith Militant (the Warrior's Sons and the Poor Fellows), to falsely confess to having sex with Margaery and two of her three cousins. She becomes excited after she learns that Margaery is indeed having sex with someone else, after forcing Grand Maester Pycelle to tell her what potions he is bringing to the girl in the nights. She is suppored by Osmund as she pressures the Grand Maester to tell her the truth. Pycelle admits that he has not only been giving Margaery sleeping potions, but also moon tea, which is used to prevent pregnancies. Needing more evidence for the Faith before commencing her scheme with Osney, Cersei decides to use as their pawn Wat, a singer in service of the Tyrells publicly known as the Blue Bard, to finally remove Margaery from court.
Cersei accuses the Blue Bard of seducing and sleeping with Margaery. The singer denies it, even after Cersei smashes him in the face with his own lute. She has the Blue Bard arrested and sent to the black cells, in the dungeons' lowest level, despite the young singer insisting he has never done such thing. Cersei has him stripped and tortured by Qyburn, who mutilates him by removing one each of his eyes and nipples. Under torture, the Blue Bard is commanded to tell the exact story Cersei wants him to, and to name a list of alleged lovers of Margaery. After is mind is broken to the point of insanity and trauma by Qyburn, the singer names Ser Osney Kettleblack, Ser Loras Tyrell, the twins Ser Horas and Ser Hobber Redwyne, Ser Tallad the Tall, Ser Lambert Turnberry, Prince Jalabhar Xho, Hugh Clifton, Ser Mark Mullendore, Ser Bayard Norcross, and Hamish the Harper as Margaery's lovers, and claims they all have carnal relationships with her. However, Cersei decides to have the Blue Bard remove Loras and the Redwyne twins from his "song"; Loras because the accusation is not credible to the public (although she is conviced that Loras and his sister Margaery are having a sexual relationship) and the twins because she needs House Redwyne and the Arbor's support with their massive ans strong naval fleet, in order to deal with the ongoing ironborn war and invasion of the Reach by King Euron III Greyjoy, which threatens the Iron Throne. The Blue Bard is released and instructed to repeat his confession in front of the court, with the promise of being allowed to take the black and go to the Wall.
As part of her plan, Cersei tells Osney to "confess" to the High Septon that he has slept with Margaery and her cousins Megga, Alla, and Elinor Tyrell. After being convinced by her friend with benefits Lady Taena, Cersei agreed to name Alla as innocent, since they may be able to use her to bear witness against Margaery and the other two girls. Osney agrees with taking part in the ploy, but first tells Cersei that "the best lies have some truth in them", to "give them flavor", making it clear is asking for sex again. Thus, Cersei has sex with Osney again, to make sure he follows her instructions.
At the Gates of the Moon, the winter castle of House Arryn, Petyr Baelish tells Sansa that Oswell Kettleblack has heard "interesting news" from the crew of the Merling King, which has returned to Gulltown.
Ser Osney heads to the Great Sept of Baelor and falsely confesses to the "Sparrow" High Septon that he has slept with Margaery, Alla, Megga, and Elinor. Osney is arrested by the Warrior's Sons. The High Sparrow, however is suspicious of Osney's confession, as he has never heard "a man so pleased to be so guilty", and has Osney tortured through a brutal whipping to verify his confession. Osney eventually breaks under such torture, confessing now another version. He now claims not to have any carnal knowledge of Margaery, instead confesses he has been having sexual relations with the Queen Regent Cersei. He even reveals that he murdered the previous High Septon on her orders.
Queen Margaery and her cousins Alla, Megga, and Elinor are arrested by the Warrior's Sons for adultery and high treason. The news is quickly delivered by Septa Moelle to Cersei, also revealing that Margaery's private parts have been checked and indeed her maidenhead is not intact. Pycelle also reluctantly discloses to the Septa that Margaery has had him mix moon tea on many occasions. Unaware about Osney's confession under torture, Cersei happily gathers the court to make the news public at the throne room, announcing the scandal of Margaery's crimes. She leaves Ser Osmund out of sight when she makes the announcement. On Cersei's instructions, Ser Osfryd observes which nobles are leaving the throne room when they hear the news.
Cersei has Tommen sign ten blank arrest warrants, to which she then affixes the names of Wat the Blue Bard, Ser Tallad the Tall, Ser Lambert Turnberry, Prince Jalabhar Xho, Hugh Clifton, Ser Mark Mullendore, Ser Bayard Norcross, Hamish the Harper, and Ser Horas and Ser Hobber Redwyne. On her orders, Ser Osfryd arrests these men, although she plans for the Redwyne twins to be found innocent of the charges of bedding Margaery, in order maintain positive relationships with the Arbor.
The next morning, Cersei and Taena head to the Great Sept of Baelor to meet the High Septon and Margaery her cousins, who have been stripped of their clothes and dignity by the Faith, while being asked once every hour to confess their fornications. The Tyrell girls will remain held by the Faith until the day of their trial. If Margaery demands for a trial by combat, Osmund will not be able to fight in it, as he is brother to one of her accusers.
Deep beneath the dungeons of Visenya's Hill, the High Septon denies Cersei's request to have Ser Osney released into her custody. Instead he escorts her to Osney's cell, revealing to her that he has been brutally whipped by the Faith. When the angered Cersei tells the High Septon that Osney came by his own free will, the man responds that he heard many men confess, yet rarely ever heard a man "so pleased to be so guilty". That is why the High Septon ordered for Osney to be tortured and questioned, and the more they questioned him, the more Osney's offenses changed. When the High Septon asks Osney if he has any carnal knowledge of "the queen", Osney points at Cersei and states "Aye. That one there." Again, he confessed that Cersei ordered him to kill the previous High Septon. Horrified at what she just heard, Cersei runs away from the cell, seeking the way out of the Great Sept in terror, only to chased and ultimately overwhelmed by a group of septas, who then drag her into her own cell.
Osney and Cersei, as well as Margaery and her cousins, remain imprisoned beneath the Great Sept of Baelor, awaiting trial, whilst Taena managed to escape, inform the small council, then run away from the city with her lord husband Orton - the Hand of the King - back to their son in the Reach. Qyburn delivers the broken prisoner Blue Bard to the Faith, who torture him once more, although he keeps repeating Cersei's version, and finally appears to go completely insane and remains held by the Faith.
Cersei is stripped of her regency by Grand Maester Pycelle, who took over the governance of the small council along with lord treasurer Ser Harys Swyft, Lancel's maternal grandfather. Pycelle and Swyft remove Osfryd from his position as Commander of the City Watch, so that he cannot use the gold cloaks to come to Cersei and his brother's aid. The council replaces him with the Watch's captain of the Dragon Gate, Humfrey Waters. Pycelle sends a raven to Ser Kevan Lannister, to offer him the Regency of the realm, while Mace Tyrell at Storm's End and Randyll Tarly at Maidenpool are also informed of the events at court.
A Dance with Dragons[]
In Essos, the exile criminal Tyrion met Penny, one of the dwarfs who jousted during Joffrey's wedding feast. During the sea journey to Qarth, Penny mentions to Tyrion that she and her late brother Oppo (killed after being mistaken for the wanted Tyrion) had been hired in Pentos by a man whose name was "something like Osmund or Oswald" (presumably Oswell). It was a scheme by Petyr Baelish to have the dwarf siblings used by Joffrey to antagonize Tyrion.
Osney is one of the people that Cersei now hates due to her accusing them of betraying her, the others being Orton Merryweather, Harys Swyft, Aurane Waters (who before joining Cersei's side fought for Stannis until his capture at the Blackwater), and Pycelle, and even wondering if she should include Jaime with them, although she ultimately decides not to, and does not even include her uncle Kevan, who is now the Lord Regent of the Seven Kingdoms. She still considers Qyburn and Taena her friends.
While Osney and Cersei remain locked beneath the Great Sept, Margaery and her three cousins have been returned to the Red Keep by the Faith as soon as Lord Randyll Tarly - now Tommen's justiciar/master of laws - returned to King's Landing with an army before Mace, and has seized the four girls under his custody, although they are still to attend their trial by the Faith, even if the case against them is weak as not as serious as Cersei's.
After days of staying locked in a cold cell to pray the Seven and see only Septa Unella, Septa Moelle, and Septa Scolera, and being visited only once by Qyburn, Cersei breaks and decides to confess to the High Sparrow. Cersei truthfully confesses to have slept with Lord Lancel Lannister and Osney, whilst falsely confessing to have slept with Osmund and Osfryd as well. However, due to Osney's accusations, the High Septon still accuses her of high treason, incest, regicide, and deicide, as Osney said that Cersei is guilty of all those under torture. She manages to talk her way out of the charges of murdering her late husband, King Robert I Baratheon and the previous High Septon, the latter being accepted as Osney's crime. She even walks out of the accusation of perjury against the Tyrell girls. The final accusation, which is incest, does not come from Kettleblack, but an allegation from the Iron Throne claimant, Stannis Baratheon. As the Faith dreads and despises Stannis and his "red demon" religion, the High Septon avoids prosecuting Cersei for the allegations, as the Faith is eager to condemn Stannis for his religious crimes. Nevertheless, Osney's accusation are still taken seriously, and in the end the High Septon makes it clear he will not let Cersei walk out of this, instead deciding to trust the Gods' justice by giving Cersei have a trial by combat, meaning losing will result in her execution.
After the small council receives word from the Faith about Cersei's confession, Osmund and Osney are arrested and imprisoned in the dungeons by the Lord Regent Kevan Lannister. After being forced to make a walk of atonement, Cersei is returned to the Red Keep to await for her trial by combat, whilst Osney remains imprisoned by the Faith. Osney will be executed for the murder of the previous High Septon, while Kevan plans to send Osmund and Osfryd to the Wall, if they plead guilty, or have them face Ser Robert Strong in trial by combat, if they plead innocent. Shortly afterwards, however, Kevan and Pycelle are both murdered by Varys, in order to keep the realm in chaos, because order was being restored by Kevan, and to fuel the tensions, fear, disarmony, and animosity between Cersei, the Tyrells, and the Faith, leaving the fate of the Kettleblack brothers on hold, while their father Oswell is in the Gates of the Moon in the Vale, with Baelish, Sansa, and Lord Robert Arryn.