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“ | You have stolen something from us, Steckler. I've come a long way to get it back. Return it and we will be good friends again, jawohl, Steckler? Oh, by the way, Steckler, that first little sale that you arranged, we had to cancel that. That lovely agent from the German government was very upset with you when you double-crossed him. I think he would've killed you, so, we killed him instead. We cut off his head. | „ |
~ Grimmer coaxing Steckler, Harry, and the others to reveal themselves within the fog while displaying a severed head. |
Joseph Grimmer is the main antagonist of the 1990 American action comedy film, Loose Cannons. He is a chief of intelligence and the leader of a group of German mercenaries hired by Kurt Von Metz, a German politician/former Nazi running for chancellor of Germany in a matter of days, to retrieve a stolen film containing evidence that could be used against the latter.
He was portrayed by the late Paul Koslo.
Personality[]
Joseph Grimmer is shown to be mean, stubborn, opportunistic, cruel, aggressive, selfish, arrogant, ruthless, merciless, and temperamental. His obsession with killing people mostly renders him more lustful for blood and death up to a point where he proves to be murderous, fanatical, sociopathic, sadistic, bloodthirsty, insane, senseless, and psychotic. He can be very impatient when he doesn't get exactly what he wants or if there's a crisis on his hands. He dislikes being lectured even by his superiors whom he considers as "morons".
As chief of intelligence and leader of a group of German mercenaries, he has displayed some intelligence whenever he knew where to find and kill or even attempt to kill his targets.
Biography[]
Having learned that his boss, former Nazi, Kurt Von Metz, who is running for chancellor of Germany soon, has had a classified, but valuable Nazi film (revealing some Nazi pornography, Von Metz's Nazi past, and his link to Hitler's suicide during WWII) stolen from him by his former secretary, Steckler, who intends to sell it to the highest bidder rather than give it to the German government as originally planned due to bribes, Joseph Grimmer and his men are sent to find and kill him and anyone else who has seen the stolen film while retrieving the said stolen item at the same time.
One night, Grimmer and his men are out searching and hunting down for the last four remaining victims all dressed up as Alice in Wonderland characters including Steckler and the highest bidder, Harry "The Hippo" Gutterman (dressed as the Queen of Hearts) by powerboat. To coax them into revealing themselves within the fog, Grimmer pulls out a severed head of a German government agent whom Steckler had double-crossed earlier with a fishing pole, which scares the heck out of the victims who then quickly take refuge on shore. Nevertheless, Grimmer manages to kill only two men dressed as the White Rabbit and the Cheshire Cat (Mueller) and later, remove any identifiable objects on them while Harry and Steckler successfully escape.
A few days later, Grimmer and his men follow Gutterman driving with two cops: MacArthur "Mac" Stern and Ellis Fielding offering him witness protection in exchange for testifying evidence. Grimmer tries to blow them up with a bazooka, but misses. When he tries again, Mac manages to take out their car engine, causing Grimmer to fall out. Then, when he and his men escape, they find themselves chased by the cops, but to no avail due to Ellis' multiple personality disorder.
Later, at night, due to a crisis on his hands with Steckler's sudden disappearance, Grimmer meets up with one of Von Metz's people during a TV interview with Von Metz despite orders never to be seen near Von Metz and to meet at another rendezvous point. Grimmer is reprimanded for all those murders he committed since he was under direct orders to simply retrieve the film, not start a holocaust, but Grimmer gets offended due to his animosity of being lectured and his superiors' "idiocy" including Von Metz's. When he is told to simply find Steckler and allow him to believe that he will be forgiven with a better offer while retrieving the film as well, Grimmer brushes it off and vows to kill the last two remaining victims to further correct any mistakes committed. However, when being reprimanded yet again, he refuses to listen and simply asks to let each one do his own job and threatens to cut off his superior's fingers if the latter ever touches him again before kissing him on the cheek and then leaving.
The next day, Grimmer and his men follow Gutterman and the two cops (now accompanied by the Mossad led by Rebecca "Riva" Lohengren) travelling by train to Cleveland in helicopters after giving the FBI the slip. Grimmer forces the train conductor to stop the train by shooting on the ground. When the train stops and already two German mercenaries fail to retrieve Gutterman, Grimmer and his other men try to catch up to them, but fail when the three men deliberately jump from the bridge into a river. So now, Grimmer and his men are forced to return to their helicopters and pursue them by air again. Nevertheless, Grimmer and his men are unable to locate them due to hiding in the woods and retreat.
The next morning, Grimmer and his men follow and find the three men at Harry's bathhouse in New York where Harry intends to meet Steckler later on. During a shootout, Grimmer loses three of his men to Stern and Gutterman whereas he unfortunately manages to kill Steckler even though he temporarily needed him alive. Once Grimmer and his remaining men have the three men cornered at gunpoint inside Gutterman's office, the Mossad arrive and try to arrest them, but Grimmer threatens to kill their collaborators, thus, forcing them out of the building. Then, Grimmer eventually learns that Steckler told Ellis the whereabouts of the film with his dying breath and threatens to kill the other two men unless Ellis cooperates when he refuses to talk. Instead of telling him, Ellis offers to show him. Once outside, Grimmer tries to shoot Gutterman when he reveals to the Mossad that they're going to Grand Central Station, only to be slightly stopped by Ellis, thus, leaving Gutterman simply wounded on his rear instead. When police sirens are heard approaching, everyone gets out of sight except for a few of Grimmer's men who find themselves arrested by the police whereas Gutterman is taken to a hospital.
At the Station, Grimmer forces Mac and Ellis to show them where the film is, not knowing that Ellis actually intends to lead them off-track as they go further down to the subway. Despite Mac having escaped after he and Ellis temporarily subdue their captors, Ellis is shot on the leg and recaptured again before Grimmer and a few of his men take him inside a basement where they begin torturing him for information. After more of his men have been arrested by cops and others have been dealt with by Mac having returned to save Ellis and once he gets the information he needs despite the minor entertainment provided by Ellis in the process, Grimmer intends to shoot him, but not before being forced to flee with his last man by Mac just in time.
Grimmer searches in vain for the film in one of the lockers under the name "Griesendorfer" inside Workers' Area B, not knowing that it was another trick by Ellis since Steckler actually said that the film was, in fact, inside Locker 64. After Mac retrieves the film himself, Grimmer is held at gunpoint by Mac until it is unintentionally spoiled by a lady cop mistaking him for a thief. After Grimmer's last man knocks the lady cop out, Grimmer and his man are subdued by Mac by toppling a locker on them as he escapes with the film. However, Grimmer manages to get through and finally finds and holds Mac at gunpoint inside a room, forcing the latter to give him the film. In doing so, Grimmer is distracted by more of Ellis' character impersonations; much to his minor amusement, and later, his threat to shoot him. With Grimmer distracted, Mac manages to throw the film through a wall, which lands on the ground at the Station and is taken by the Mossad, before Grimmer shoots him on the leg. Then, Grimmer is finally shot dead by Ellis as he falls through the same wall and lands on a fruit stand.
With Grimmer and some of his men either dead or arrested, the Mossad are free to broadcast the film during Von Metz's speech at a convention later at night and exploit the latter's Nazi history, thus, discrediting and leaving him completely powerless while Mac, Ellis, and Gutterman recover from their injuries at the hospital.
Quotes[]
“ | Nein! I'm telling you. You do your job, and I do mine. And if you ever touch me again, dann schneide ich deine Finger ab. | „ |
~ Grimmer threatening one of his superiors. |
“ | Hold your fire! We have your collaborators. Out the door now! Now, out! Or we kill everybody! Now! Schnell! | „ |
~ Grimmer forcing the Mossad out of the bathhouse. |
“ | Thank you for the information. You've been a very entertaining fellow. Now, Auf Wiedersehen. | „ |
~ Grimmer thanking Ellis before intending to shoot him. |
“ | All right, hold it, Cookie Monster. Come down, Pussycat. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Get down. Down the ladder! Give me my film. Easy, give me the film. | „ |
~ Grimmer forcing Mac at gunpoint to give him the film. |
Gallery[]
Trivia[]
- Though he was merely hired help, Joseph Grimmer's unlawful actions render him a great threat to the movie's protagonists within the plot.