| “ | No! I'm the rightful heir! The crown and kingdom belong to me! | „ |
| ~ Laird after his young brother, Heath has been crowned king instead. |
| “ | I sent you for my shoes, NOT MY KINGDOM!!! | „ |
| ~ Laird scolding Heath after losing the throne to him before retrieving his shoes. |
| “ | Curse all of you! I will have revenge! I vow these golden shoes will never leave my feet until I have regained that which is rightfully mine! | „ |
| ~ Laird vowing revenge after losing the throne and being banished to rule over the Pig Kingdom by Heath. |
Laird is the main antagonist of the 2002 animated fantasy musical film, The Princess and the Pea (which is based on the popular 1835 fairy tale of the same name by Hans Christian Andersen). He is the greedy older brother of King Heath, Helsa's husband, Hildegarde's father, the late Queen Mariana's brother-in-law, and Daria's uncle.
He was voiced by the late Ronan Vibert, who also portrayed Vidocq in Doctor Lautrec and the Forgotten Knights and Perry Cline in Hatfields & McCoys.
Biography[]
Due to the coming of age of his father, Laird, being the eldest next to his brother, Heath, is destined to be crowned king soon; according to the law. The day before the coronation, Laird travels back to the palace of the kingdom of Corazion by horse carriage with his gluttonous wife, Helsa and their pet falcon, Plague as they express their displeasure of the people singing, accompanied by Heath, his wife, Mariana, and later, young Prince Rollo and his dog, Winthrop.
In the throne room, as Helsa begins to eat, Laird sings while stating to an intervening Rollo that it takes gold to rule a kingdom. Offended by Rollo's remarks, Laird throws his best golden shoes at him before leaving in frustration and anger with Helsa and Plague.
The next day, Laird refuses to go to the ceremony simply because he can't find or even remember where he last left his golden shoes despite owning lots of shoes until Rollo reminds him. Through Rollo's suggestion, however, Laird sends out Heath to fetch his shoes from the throne room for him. It doesn't take Laird long enough to realize that he had been tricked when he hears the trumpeters trumpeting and rushes straight to the throne room, only to find to his displeasure that Heath has been crowned king instead considering the loophole within the law which further states that the first of any of the sons, whether he be the eldest or the youngest, to enter shall be crowned king in the end. After retrieving his shoes, Laird scolds and berates Heath for taking the throne from him. As he and his wife leave, they are suddenly banished to rule over the Pig Kingdom by Heath as his first act as king; much to their shock and disgust. On the night of his upcoming banishment, Laird secretly vows vengeance and that he will never take off his shoes until he has claimed that which he thinks is rightfully his.
Nine months later, Laird laments over his experience during his rule over the Pig Kingdom. When he learns that his wife has given birth to a girl they later name Hildegarde, Laird begins to lose hope of any chance of regaining his throne and finally, takes off his smelly shoes after so long. Then, Laird is visited by a messenger who informs him of both the joyous birth of Heath's daughter later named Daria and the tragic death of his wife during the delivery. Knowing that both he and his brother have daughters, Laird comes up with a rather devious plan on how to assume the throne otherwise. Laird sends a message to his brother claiming that he and Helsa had lost their own daughter to a fictional disease and asks that the latter take care of his daughter instead as he falsely leads Heath to believe that he had changed over the past nine months since his exile and put aside their differences.
Arriving at the palace, Laird sneaks in with his own daughter through a secret passageway and later, at night, he enters his niece's bedroom where both he and Helsa make the switch; thinking that with their own daughter on the throne would ensure that they will finally reclaim what was stolen from them in the first place as they vow to raise her to become a regular life torment to Heath while Plague serves as their messenger. However, having pity for their niece considering how both lost their own mothers at a young age, Helsa demands Laird promise not to harm the child other than the fact that she's their family and hardly responsible for their loss and "injustice", to which Laird begrudgingly agrees to before they make the switch. Then, when Helsa suggests about giving her to a good family, Laird sarcastically replies he knows just the one for her.
Eighteen years later, overjoyed to see how their daughter, Hildegarde has grown into the vicious, spoiled, little brat of a monster that she is today through Helsa's teachings, Laird praises his wife for the result and becomes even happier when he learns from her that their daughter wishes to marry the now-adult Prince Rollo she's been chasing after from the palace to the village all day, so, Laird instructs her to teach Hildegarde a few lessons in deceit and hypocrisy and to tell her their little secret tonight while he does a little matchmaking with Rollo. After Helsa and Hildegarde leave, Laird assures Rollo of Hildegarde's absence and somehow generously offers him and his horse a bed and stable as he tries to deceive him through lies about Hildegarde to ensure the marriage between the two.
A few days later, Laird is given a message Plague had intercepted from Sebastian, the scholar bird working for Heath, and is outraged to learn that Heath intends to disinherit Hildegarde since Rollo has failed to find the right princess to marry and Hildegarde has proven herself to be nothing like what Heath had expected she would be. So, he decides that it's time for Daria the pig girl to disappear forever while burning the message. At night, Laird leads the people into a revolt against Daria, the pigs, and her adoptive so-called family, convincing them and accusing her of being a witch. During the chase and when they find themselves unable to cross the log bridge guarded by Daria's friend, Balthazar the bear, Laird has the people throw in their torches instead to ensure the girl's demise. Despite his best attempts to save her after being been falsely informed by Laird about trying to stop the riot, Rollo fails and succumbs to the smoke exhaust in Laird's arms as the latter falsely leads everyone to believing that Rollo wishes to marry Hildegarde at last.
The next day, Laird is present at the palace with his family and Heath during Rollo and Sebastian's recovery since the news of his engagement to Hildegarde has been announced. Later on, as Rollo is about to marry Hildegarde, Laird, Helsa, and Plague stop Sebastian from interfering with their plans after the latter finally learns the truth about Daria, having survived the fire, and tie him up before Laird leaves to find Daria. Once the wedding has been interrupted by Sebastian and one of Daria's pig friends and both the trick with the heart-shaped birthmark on Hildegarde's left foot and the truth about Heath's true daughter have been exposed, Laird has captured Daria and holds her hostage. As Helsa and Hildegarde leave to join up with him, Laird has Plague finish Rollo off with a falling chandelier, only for Heath to take the fall for him instead. With Heath supposedly dead, Laird proclaims himself king and denounces Daria as an impostor until he is shocked and angered to find that Heath has miraculously survived. Then, both Laird, Helsa, Hildegarde, and Plague escape with Daria through a secret passageway only he knows of ever since his discovery when he was a boy. Knowing they're being followed by Rollo and Winthrop, Laird intends to lure him through a passage of booby traps he once created to amuse himself after he discovered the secret passageway, only to be foiled by one of the pigs. As Laird is about to strike the pig with an axe in retaliation, he finds himself facing Rollo at sword point until he tries dropping heavy debris on him, which fails when he miraculously survives.
Outside, with Hildegarde threatening to throw Daria off the edge to stop Rollo from pursuing them, Laird tries to tip him off balance from behind, leaving Rollo hanging for dear life on the succumbing rails. Then, Laird orders Plague to finish Rollo off, only for the latter to be defeated by Sebastian in armor. Further angered and annoyed and after dealing with Sebastian, Laird tries to finish Rollo off himself once and for all with his axe until he is tipped off balance by Daria from behind and falls into the river. Once Hildegarde has been dealt with as well, Laird, Plague, Hildegarde, and later, Helsa are finally arrested by the Royal Guards for their treachery.
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