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The Guinea Pirate also known by his alter ego Michael Chertoff is a minor antagonist in South Park, he only appeared as the main antagonist of the Pandemic arc. He is the leader of the Guinea Creatures and Craig's "arch nemesis".
He was voiced by Trey Parker who also voices many other characters on the show.
Personality[]
Guinea Pirate is shown to be very manipulative as he used his authority and convinced the homeland security to get rid of Peruvian flute bands, he is also shown to not take others trauma into consideration as when Kyle as a desperate way to avoid going to Peru claimed he was "traumatized because one of his friends just raped in Peru."
Appearance[]
In his disguise, he is just an animated caricature of the real-life Chertoff. As Guinea Pirate, he is a giant orange Guinea pig that wears a pirate costume.
History[]
At some point prior to the events of Pandemic, he took on the persona of Michael Chertoff and he became the secretary of Homeland Security. Since Peruvian flute bands were able to ward of the Guinea Creatures, he decided to have them arrested to start the "Furry Death" where the Guinea Creatures (a race of giant Guinea pig-like monsters) would terrorize the world. He later appeared to tell the imprisoned bands (including the boys) that they will be shipped to Guantanamo Bay where they would spend the rest of their lives. He later told his minions that he wants to take out Peru so Peruvians will be extinct which will destroy any chance of Peruvian flute bands. Chertoff then recruits the boys to aid him in his plans of taking out Peru due to him thinking that they are "hybrids". He later reveals to David that he knew what was going to happen and he uses a long monstrous tongue to kill him, and he says that the only one who could stop him (which is Craig) is going to the middle of nowhere. Chertoff then asks if the flute bands were shipped but gets enraged when he learns this was not the case. Chertoff's goons tell him about the Guinea Creatures, and he evilly laughs but lies about thinking of a joke, he then demands to go to Machu Pichu. Chertoff then arrives and urinates on a statue. Craig then confronts Chertoff and orders his goons to shoot them. Chertoff then goes on a rant about the prophecy, but he is shot but nothing happens to him. He then reveals his true form and prepares to battle the boys, but Craig inadvertently defeats him despite saying he won't interfere with his plans. Guinea Pirate is then arrested after his defeat. Guinea Pirate then managed to escape and continues terrorizing South Park, it's unknown what happened to him afterwards, but he was most likely defeated again.
Trivia[]
- It is unknown if Michael Chertoff was a real person in the South Park universe that Guinea Pirate killed and impersonated to use his influence to his advantage.