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I was the Republican senate majority lead.
~ Mitch McConnell

Addison Mitchell "Mitch" McConnell, Jr. is a minor antagonist in Paradise P.D., only appearing in the episode "Ice Ice Babies". He is a Republican turtle, who gave up his seat on the Republican senate to stalk a girl who was less than half his age in hopes of having sex with her

Biography

In "Ice Ice Babies", Mitch McConnell was one of the creepy, perverted stalkers, among the Stuffed Animal Midgets. He said that one day, he spotted Crystal for the first time and fell in love with her. He needed to have her so he resigned from the Republican Senate in order to pursue his new goal in life, to have sex with Crystal. Mitch McConnell used his turtle-like appearance to his advantage to pose as a toy turtle and eventually end up becoming one of Crystal's belongings. Crystal set him down in her house with her stuffed animals and Mitch waited for the day when Crystal would take him onto the bed with her and sleep with him. One of the creepy old men in the stuffed animal team particularly resented him because as a turtle guy, he didn't even need to dress up. Bullet had no respect for McConnell or any of the creepy stuffed animals for that matter and just beat him up and went onto the bed out of turn, instead. Mitch McConnell later watched in sexual pleasure as he watched Crystal have sex with her boyfriend, Jammer.

In "PARAD-ISIS", Mitch McConnell was among the International Society of Insulted Selebrities, offended by his portrayal on the show. He said that he was not a turtle, and rathr that he was a tortoise. Later, Gina Jabowski jumped on him and kicked his shell into some other celebrities.

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Paradise P.D.
Randall Crawford | Bullet | Gina Jabowski | Dusty Marlow | Gerald Fitzgerald | Stanley Hopson

Legion of Dooooom
Gerald Fitzgerald | Thester Carbomb IV | Frank Flipperfist | Jerry Flipperfist | Pedro Pooptooth | Edna Dorsaldigits | Puffy the Cigarette | Pat Robertson | Harvey Weinstein | Russian Mobster | Marcos Narcos | Agent Clappers | Brett DeMarco | Jesus Christ | Flipper People | Dolphin Queen | The Kingpin

International Society of Insulted Selebrities
Ron Perlman | Pat Robertson | Tucker Carlson | Steve Harvey | Tom Selleck | Carrot Top | Jenny McCarthy | Bill Clinton | Joe Biden | Mitch McConnell | Russell Crowe

Repeat Offenders
Karen Crawford | Robby | Delbert | Dean Hancock | Frank Flipperfist | Mr. Meowgi | Mrs. Two-Toes | Dr. Johann | Karla 9000 | Satan | Lady Gertrude | Tucker Carlson | Thester Carbomb IV | Dobby | Cop Bot | Agent Clappers | William | Paradise Nuking Survivors | (Clovis | Mr. Pussbubble | Arm Head) | Agatha Culpepper

One-Time Offenders
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