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Ms. Kelp: You are late!
Lisa: But class doesn't start in five minutes-
Ms. Kelp: Who decides when class starts? The teacher, or some fallible mechanical device? Take your seat, and no more back talk. Now get out your notebook. Our first lesson today will be... Penmanship!
~ Ms. Kelp's first introduction

Ms. Kelp is Lisa Simpson's new substitute teacher and the main antagonist in the comic book Simpsons Comics #4 - It's in the Cards. She is a bossy teacher who believes that everyone should be treated differently, also treating Lisa Simpson poorly as well. She is also revealed to also be racist as she doesn't believe in diversity.

History[]

Ms. Kelp becomes Lisa's substitute teacher who doesn't like Lisa at all. It starts on the first day when she tells Lisa she is late, although the lesson actually starts in five minutes.

Their conflict continues due Ms. Kelp's very "special" teaching methods which usually involve rewriting books in order to practice calligraphy. When Lisa suggests it would be better if they wrote their own ideas down, Ms. Kelp angrily tells her to continue and keep her individuality in.

Mr. Somerset would give Lisa Simpson an "F" because she plagiarized Marcel Duchamp work for an Arts & Crafts show instead of expressing her own individuality, with Somerset telling Lisa that she need to actually challenge herself next time.

Despite working hard, Lisa simply can't get along with her new teacher and is punished and taunted all the time. Later, the art's and craft's show then takes place at school and Lisa brings a sand casting which represented many races and cultures joining hand. However, Ms. Kelp misinterprets it as an anti-multicultural theme and Lisa gets an "A".

Miss Kelp was never seen again afterwards, meaning that she likely had quit her job as a substitute teacher, therefore meaning Kelp gets no punishment for her mistreatment of Lisa Simpson.

Personality[]

She is a very strict, bossy, narrow-minded, and harsh teacher who is tend to be quite mean to Lisa.

However, even though she did give Lisa an "A" later in the comic, that was just because she misinterpreted it as not multicultural, meaning that Kelp is also a bigoted supremacist.

Quotes[]

(Lisa Simpson raises her hand)
Ms. Kelp: What is it, miss Simpson?
Lisa: Miss Kelp, I can't help thinking that, ah... Interesting as it may be to explore the views of such an... influential thinker, it may be more worthwhile if we wrote our own thoughts, rather than copying something out of a book! That way we could practice both our penmanship and our composition skills at the same-
Ms. Kelp: WHAT?! Are you criticizing the book I assigned you?
Lisa: I'm merely suggesting a way to enrich the learning experience for all of us. Isn't that what school is for?
Ms. Kelp: I had you pegged as a troublemaker! The purpose of school is to teach you obedience, discipline, and respect for authority!
Lisa: But we're CHILDREN! Each of us has an innate individuality that yearns to be respected and nurtured!
Ms. Kelp: Suppress it.
~ Ms. Kelp to Lisa Simpson when she criticized the book she gave to Lisa to work on.
Lisa: This sand casting represents the many races and cultures who have joined hands to make our city what it is today.
Ms. Kelp: Excellent, Lisa. I whole-heartedly agree! The evil forces of politically correct multi-culturalism are to blame for the disgraceful condition of our city! Your fine piece of right-thinking social criticism deserves an"A!"
Lisa: But that's not what I meant-
~ Ms. Kelp as she misinterpret Lisa's sand casting for a Anti-Multicultural theme.

Mentions[]

Bart: What are you doing here so late?
Lisa Simpson: Miss Kelp made me write "I will not talk back to my superiors" on the chalkboard 100 times. You'd think that a teacher would recognize the worthlessness of such a rote exercise. What are you doing here?
Bart: Mr. Somerset made me stay after school to help him make a stupid banner for that stupid art & stupid crafts show tomorrow. He said he wanted my "creative input," whatever that means!
'Lisa & Bart: *Both sighs*
~ Lisa and her interaction with Bart, with Lisa talking about Miss Kelp.
Lisa: She completely misunderstood! She thought I was attacking the very ideas I was trying to honor!
Bart: What are you complaining about? At least you got an "A"!
Marge: Now, kids, I know you're disappointed by your teacher's reactions, but try not to feel too bad about it! After all, Lisa, when it comes to creativity, you have to be true to your own vision; You can't worry too much about what other people think!
Lisa: You're right, mom! I know my piece is good. I'm not going to let Miss Kelp discourage me!
~ Lisa Simpson as she decides not to let Miss Kelp discourage her of her own individuality anymore after Marge Simpson helped give her a helpful speech to her.

Trivia[]

  • She is similar to another substitute teacher, Ms. Cantwell, who also bullied Lisa.

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