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“ | I was his number 1 guy. No one's every been his number 1 guy. But I was his number 1 guy....and he called me his BUDDY! | „ |
~ Roger reflecting on God's love he would have for him if the Nostalgia Critic had never been born. |
“ | If you go, all will be at peace. | „ |
~ Roger to the Nostalgia Critic. |
Roger is an antagonist in the Nostalgia Critic comedy Christmas episode, You're a Rotten Dirty Bastard.
He was portrayed by Orlando Berlisle, Jr.
Biography[]
Roger is an angel in Heaven and was envious of God, wanting to usurp Him and become His number one., Apparently no angel ever was on friendly terms with God.
Appearances in the show[]
You're a Rotten Dirty Bastard[]
Roger features in this Christmas themed special where the Nostalgia Critic decides to quit reviewing forever, much to Ma-Ti's dismay. But when the Critic gets up to leave, a glowing ball of light descends from the Heavens and morphs into human form, that of a black man named Roger, who then announces himself to the Critic, who punches him out, saying he's had enough Jehova's Witnesses today. However, Roger persists and comes back to the Critic, who when seeing he's being interrupted twists Roger's penis with a pair of pliers, causing him to gag. Then, the Critic finally takes notice of Roger, when he introduces himself as his guardian angel.
When the Critic says "If you're an angel, where's your wings?", Roger gets all furious, saying "Yes yes I've heard that one before!" and then gradually calms down and he says that what if he showed the Critic a universe where he never even existed. Who knows, the Critic may have made more people happier in his real world. Interested, the Critic complies, and Roger gets him to hold his robe, and they teleport to Linkara, who seems to be drunken and depressed at a pub, but this is until he is revealed to be president of Marvel and DC Comics.
This infuriates the Critic, and confuses Roger, so he teleports him to the Cinema Snob. The Snob seems to be a depressed plumber, until he is revealed to be the biggest porn star on Earth. The confused Roger teleports the Critic to Angry Joe, who is revealed to be the President of the United States of America, angry at Canada's evil empire, and destroys Canada.
Confused, Roger takes the Critic to Spoony, and he is revealed, in a big joke, to be the Nostalgia Critic himself - he is loving every movie rather than hating it, and Douchy McNitpick appears, who was formerly harassing and nitpicking the Critic, but this time he hilariously compliments Spoony on his success. Finally hating Roger, the Critic eventually agrees to see the Nostalgia Chick, convinced that without him she would have nothing, only to discover that she is more successful than if he were alive. Not only does she have a handsome husband and a kid, she is a successful actress rather than a depressed Internet celebrity.
Infuriated, the Nostalgia Critic is taken back by Roger to his world, where Roger gives him a "prep talk" by vilifying him and calling him "you really are a rotten dirty bastard." Infuriated, the Critic then asks if Roger would have benefitted if the Critic hadn't been born. So, they go to Heaven in the alternate world, only to see Roger himself as God's Number One! God even says if He were to retire, Roger would become the new God.
Roger is shocked and amazed, and takes the Critic back to Earth, where he confesses that no angel ever was God's best friend, and how he could kill the Critic right now to change this problem. Roger plans to kill him with an ailment (an ailment the Critic invented on the spot, claiming he'd infect Roger if he was touched), but then the Critic absurdly says his ailment's not real. So, Roger has bigger plans, and he changes his outfit into a ninja, and brings out two swords, whacking them against the Critic, sadistically beating him. He goes insane and speeds all round the room, and jump scares the Critic, only for the rotten dirty bastard to pull out a gun. Roger boasts about how angels are immortal and how he heard from God Himself that an angel can never be killed. But the Critic shoots Roger, and Roger feels disappointed and betrayed upon seeing his mortality. So, he falls to the floor dead.
Scooby-Doo[]
Roger later reappears during the Scooby Doo review, where he torments the Critic, revealing he ended up in Purgatory because Purgatory was the Afterlife of angels. However, Roger was the only angel to end up in Purgatory because he was the only one stupid enough to fall for God's joke. Roger somehow, manages to create a temporal anomaly in which the past and future of the Nostalgia Critic come together with his present version, which would then destroy the Universe. He later deserts the Critic when the Universe is in peril and he says how he must only watch the review to save the dimension from the Plot Hole. Roger reappears and congratulates the Critic when the review is over and the movie destroyed.
Scooby-Doo 2[]
When a divine beam of light kicks the Critic in the groin when he is coming out of his office, an angelic voice asks him if he's ready to solve his next mystery. The Critic says despondently "Why am I so used to this by now?" but goes ahead and reviews Scooby-Doo 2. To his shock, the film is as bad as the original... but it does have some good dialogue and redeeming sets. Throughout the film, several attempts are made on the Critic's life, such as a beam of light dropping a tonne on the Critic's (empty) chair.
A black security guard (named Roger) shows up to pressure the group into believing he is the culprit, but the gullible fools believe it to be Jules (played by Tamara). The Critic derides Roger's attempts to wake him up, even at one point saying "Some people really need to wake up" when in fact its right in front of him, the answer, that is. The Critic finishes the review, and the beam of light scorns his efforts to find the mastermind. Then Roger, the guard, enters, and the group pins the blame... on Jules.
Furious, Roger goes into a charade about how its actually him, behind the assassination attempts on the Critic. However, the Critic says Jules was the real villain and he has evidence. Apparently, she only wanted Roger to believe he cut the tonne. Also the Critic says that he knew it was Roger all along, due to flashbacks of his past encounters with a guardian angel of the same name.
He gets Roger increasingly exasperated, and at the end of the review, an angry Roger asks the Critic if he wants to know how he keeps coming back from the dead so much. To which the group say if Scooby-Doo had no consistency, why should they? Furious, Roger yells "WHAT THE FLYING FUCK", but is cut off by the end credits.