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God, I hate those f-ckin' kids.
~ The White Bitch before her death.

The White Bitch is the main antagonist of the infamous 2007 spoof comedy film Epic Movie.

She was portrayed by Jennifer Coolidge, who also played Fiona Montgomery in A Cinderella Story and Jaclyn in Igor.


While the movie makes fun of many different things, it mostly does the parody of the movie The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, with her parodying Jadis the White Witch. She rules over "Gnarnia" and commands an army of brutish men and magical creatures including her top dwarf henchman Bink while declaring "wire tops", "no gay marriage" and "no black people".

She plans to destroy the resistance movement of Gnarnia that is against her by sending a wmd (weapon of mass destruction) bomb into their camp to kill them all (in a parody of one of the Superman movies). In the unrated version of the movie, the White Bitch's plan to destroy the "Gnarnian" resistance differently by using a powerful crystal that will create the continent of her own new "Gnarnia" where she and her followers will thrive (in a parody of Lex Luthor's plot from Superman Returns).

Unlike the White Witch, she is shown as a slut, offering her breasts to others to get information from them. She is killed at the end after her army is destroyed, by being run over by a wheelbarrel rode by her former spy Captain Jack Swallows.


Behold, my White Castle!
~ The White Bitch about her castle.
I won't ask again! Where is the rest of your family?
~ The White Bitch to Edward.



  • The license plate on the White Bitch's sled reads GNARNIA DRIFT, which is a nod to the title of the 2006 film The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift.
  • In the original PG-13 rated version, when Edward sees her, he says "Whoa, Stifler's Mom!", while in the unrated version, he says "What a MILF!".
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